Football Poets

You must remember this
A smile is not a smile,
A joke is not a joke,
A kiss is not a kiss,
The fundamental things apply
As time goes by –
So much of contemporary Europe
Still comes straight from the C […]

When the Windrush docked at Tilbury,
In that post-war world of austerity,
And furtive glances from behind net curtains,
Men in 50 shilling suits from Burtons,
You knew about the smoke and fog,
But not “No Blacks, […]

Just as Confusion sat enthroned upon the Tower of Babel,
So I sat in a bar named Paradise, at a formica table,
Watching Chelsea’s football match against the team from Brum,
Befuddled by the commentary which was o […]

Stuck in a rain-swept tent, I read in the newspaper,
“I think we are moving into the era of the team,
as opposed to the era of the star”,
Clap-trapped Rick Parry, of Liverpool F.C.,
As though unsung heroes wer […]

It’s the end of dignity, the end of honour.
Working for the Yankee dolour.

The day England played Portugal,
My daughter, Charlotte, left for Geneva,
And that dawn, I watched a skein of ducks
Silhouette the widening, reddening sky,
While I stood staring, thinking of her in her […]

“I spy with my little eye,
I think, and, so, am I”,
That’s what the football manager said,
Irresolutely shaking his head,
For when his team has internal divisions,
Racked and riven by domestic schisms,
The manag […]

I feint.
I dive.
I evade.
I avoid.
I bend the rules.
But obviously try to keep them.
I’m legal.
What does ethical mean?
Anyway, my agent does it all for me.
Responsibility?
I provide the circus.
You get your own bread.

In Europe it’s penalty shoot out and sudden death,
And the metaphors of sport grip
A continent. But in the Gaza Strip
A 9 year old Palestinian was listening to the ref
Yesterday, playing football in the Rafah r […]

It’s an unusual test
To play a team
Whose names all end in s,
But what an oddity,
And extra time oddysey,
To play a goalie,
One z short of his nationality;
But consonant with incongruity,
I suppose.
But the […]

Premiership players have money to burn,
But how much does a Grecian earn?

I think you’ll find
The word that comes to mind
Is Schadenfreude.

Oh, it’s a long time ago,
When Michelangelo
Painted the Sistine Chapel’s ceiling,
And I can’t help feeling
That it must be 40 years ago
When Charlton Heston played angelo
In the Agony and the Ecstasy.
But just […]

Nedved!
Your very name strikes dread
Into the heart of the opposition;
In addition,
Nominally,
You are poetry,
As well as in motion.
Talented bi-ped,
You write the ultimate text
Upon the moving blades of the […]

Mister Scolari says that brilliance does not win football matches,
The winners will be the team that makes fewer mistakes,
(Is it the least or fewer? I never know)
And in a way, he’s right, isn’t he?
But what a m […]

When the football’s so prosaic,
It’s hard to write a poem.
When it’s all so formulaic,
It’s hard to write a poem.
But with 5 per cent of the electorate
Sending a fascist message to parliament,
Our attempts to recl […]

All that glisters is not gold,
All that blisters is not bold,
England expects you to do your duty,
But expectoration might send you home early.

These days,
It’s hard to recall
Dutch Total Football.
Because, you see,
Frings aint wot
They used to be.

Asylum seekers are sent back to war and death.
Economic migrants play football in Portugal.
Economic migrants amass untold wealth,
But the number of asylum seekers continues to fall.

The day started with shining spiders’ webs
Hanging from next door’s monkey puzzle tree,
An exotic reminder of last night’s opening ceremony,
A paean of praise to Portugal’s Christian imperialism,
With cannon […]