Football Poets

Ireland International manager’s job

The Football Association of Ireland, currently leaderless, and without a manager for their International football team, have engaged ex Northern Ireland International team manager, Bryan Hamilton, as Consultant / Headhunter.

He has been busy assessing prospective candidates.

Among the job seekers : Clik the mouse! I sent in a job application, as far back as November, so assuming that it didn’t get thrown out with the Xmas cards, I’m expecting to hear from Mr Hamilton shortly.

A shortlist of six was announced today. Present on that list were :
Kenny Dalglish, Bryan Robson, Blank Stapleton, Brian Kerr and Philippe Troussier. A sixth place was left for a mystery candidate. The press currently speculate that it could be for either Peter Reid or George Burley.

But I’m hoping that Mr Hamilton wants to keep an ace up his sleeve, and I fit the bill perfectly!

Here is my job application :

13 November 2002

To the Acting Secretary General / Chief Executive
FAI
80 Merrion Square
Dublin 2

Dear Sir,

I would like to apply for the vacant position of Manager of the football team of Ireland, following the resignation of Mick McCarthy.

Although I am a mouse, I have a wide experience of football and feel I have a variety of qualities that will make me a potential candidate for the job.

The position of Irish football manager would seem to be an exacting task, but I am well used to working on a treadmill, and putting my shoulder to the wheel.

In today’s increasing media glare that surrounds such a job, you’ll find I’m a great one for cheesy sound-bites.

I can make myself at home in any location. Also, I am currently developing my football administration skills at
www.footballpoets.org

I may squeek like Alan Ball
But I’ll answer Erin’s call

I may be as shy as Paul McGrath
But I’m ready to lead the boys far

I am as cultured as Liam Brady
There’ll be no dealings shady

The presence of Dustin the turkey
May make muddy waters murky

But my application to Merrion Square
Is all above board and without compare

And when I lead the team to dizzy heights
I’ll be ever ready, with the cheesy sound-bites!

Yours sincerely,

Clik the mouse

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Dustin the Turkey : an old friend of Zig and Zag. Dustin runs for every top job going in Ireland. He often places very well in the political polls. Was once a serious candidate for President of Ireland.

The FAI face some conundrum :

Kenny Dalglish, or Clik the mouse?

Tough choice!

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