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Chelsea 2-0 Swansea

Borat Skorbard

Monday, April 29th, 2013

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 Rami started
But soon departed
A problem with his thigh

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 On came Super Frankie
Half time required a hankie
For tears to the eye….

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 Out rolled Bobby Tambling
No longer rambling
A legend amongst us all

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 Frankie’s still chasing
With each goal embracing
Waiting for that record to fall

5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 But time is a-ticking
For all his canny kicking
No contract in the offing

6 Leave a comment on verse 6 0 He edges one nearer
Penalty couldn’t be clearer
Next one it’s champers he’ll be quaffing

7 Leave a comment on verse 7 0 Swansea lacked fight
The game needed added bite –
Thankfully Suarez suspended!

8 Leave a comment on verse 8 0 And so to Frankie’s cause
There was much applause
When Mata was up-ended!

© Borat Skorbard, April 28th 2013

Notes

Premiership match # 34

A typical end of season match that lacked bite – i.e. Luis Suarez wasn’t playing!

The game became all about Frank Lampard’s quest to match and beat Bobby Tambling’s record as all-time Chelsea top scorer.
Frank is now just one behind Bobby – who was wheeled out in front of the adoring crowd at Stamford Bridge at half-time, and the fans gave him a well deserved standing ovation – which brought a tear to his eye.

Also, Frank’s penalty kick saw him equal Andy Cole’s record of scoring against 38 different teams in the Premier League.

The other sub-plot to this game, was the fact that Mark Clattenburg was reffing Chelsea for the first time since he was accused of using ‘inappropriate language’ against Jon Obi Mikel

Goal one : slick passing move, Oscar finished from the edge of the box with a great low cross-shot
Goal two : penalty, Lampard (who else?), after Leon Britton tripped Mata.

Source: http://footballpoets.org/poems/chelsea-2-0-swansea/