1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 Your missus expects you to show you care
But don’t buy her racy underwear
That’s just a present to please you
Only pricey ‘must-haves-sold-out’ will do

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 Your mates descend because you live near
The pub which also supplies your beer
They leave the ashtray full of butts
And carpet crunchy with shelled nuts

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 Elderly relatives want you to hear
Familiar tales of times now rare
They like the same stories every December
But need you to tell them ‘cos they don’t remember

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 The kids demand full festive fayre
One Wii each, they just can’t share
Every gift comes with a battery charger
Just like the kids, the bills get larger

5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 The neighbours think that you should wear
Novelty socks – they bought you a pair
They tell you what a nice chap you are
Before admitting they scratched your car

6 Leave a comment on verse 6 0 Your football team make no fuss
It’s Christmas but they’re on the bus
Preparing to play home or away
To provide you with comfort on Boxing Day

7 Leave a comment on verse 7 0 They know you feel the worse for wear
– All they ask is that you are there



The Boxing Day fixture is a favourite. An escape from The Great Escape, book tokens and toys broken!

Wishing you peace, good health and goodwill.

Source: http://footballpoets.org/poems/demanding/