Football Poets

Depor 3 Shels 0 Medley

¶ 1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 A Niggly Doubt

¶ 2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 Should we dare to fly in hope,
To dream that maybe we might cope,
To think that maybe there is scope
To snatch the holy grail?
Or is it merely self-delusion?
Brains affected by confusion
In their self-imposed seclusion,
Knowing that we’ll fail.

¶ 3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 But still the gnawing notion pesters –
What if Depor cannot best us
After their prolonged siestas?
What if Shelbourne catch them?
One small jolt of nervous tension,
Adding to the apprehension.
Surely it’s too daft to mention?
Surely we can’t match them?

¶ 4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 Á Coruňa

¶ 5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 The Spanish Armada set sail from this port
To conquer the English by sea, so they thought.
But most of their galleons received quite a shocker,
And ended up sitting on Davy Jones’ locker.

¶ 6 Leave a comment on verse 6 0 Meanwhile, at base camp, reviewing his goals,
Brave Captain Fenlon is winning at bowls.

¶ 7 Leave a comment on verse 7 0 El Shelbourne Modesto

¶ 8 Leave a comment on verse 8 0 If we could do it,
Somehow come through it,
What a marvellous night it will be,
So awe-inspiring,
No doubt acquiring
Legendary status-to-be.

¶ 9 Leave a comment on verse 9 0 Nobody rates us,
The Spanish press slates us,
They say we’re just lambs to the slaughter.
“El Shelbourne modesto,”
They’re not too impressed – oh,
Naΐve is the Spanish reporter.

¶ 10 Leave a comment on verse 10 0 Like A Virgin

¶ 11 Leave a comment on verse 11 0 It’s my first trip with Shelbourne,
I’ve never been before.
Of course we weren’t successful back
In nineteen eighty four.

¶ 12 Leave a comment on verse 12 0 Sometimes it wasn’t possible,
Sometimes I had no time,
Or my buddy in the local bank
Would not spare me a dime.

¶ 13 Leave a comment on verse 13 0 The hardened Shelbourne traveller
Recounts far-distant shores,
I feel like I’m a virgin in
A brothel full of whores.

¶ 14 Leave a comment on verse 14 0 Sheer Sporting Nirvana

¶ 15 Leave a comment on verse 15 0 Gene Pitney knew well of the mighty thin line
That can alter your future forever.
How life can be changed by a grander design,
Notwithstanding the strongest endeavour.
The angst that I feel for our starting eleven
Is starting to give me an ulcer,
For we’re twenty four hours from sheer sporting heaven,
Not twenty four hours from Tulsa.

¶ 16 Leave a comment on verse 16 0 Bin Dere Dun Dat

¶ 17 Leave a comment on verse 17 0 We went to the Torre de Hercules,
And trudged all the way to the top.
The steps spiralled round
All the way from the ground,
And we thought that they never would stop.

¶ 18 Leave a comment on verse 18 0 The Castillo was very impressive,
Jutting out in the picturesque bay,
And the remnants of Spain’s
Early Roman remains
Made a most fascinating display.

¶ 19 Leave a comment on verse 19 0 We took the old tram round the headland,
Till its progress was halted by buffers,
And we sat in a bar
Talking ‘bout games so far,
And if Deportivo would stuff us.

¶ 20 Leave a comment on verse 20 0 We lay on the Playa de Riazor,
And soaked up the rays from the sun,
And some got quite tanned
As we lay on the sand,
And some ended up overdone.

¶ 21 Leave a comment on verse 21 0 And now we’re just filling in hours,
And some are resorting to gin,
It’s really appalling
The way time is crawling,
Can’t wait for the game to begin.

¶ 22 Leave a comment on verse 22 0 Confident

¶ 23 Leave a comment on verse 23 0 Sitting on the front in Coruňa
Watching the waves rolling in,
The sun beating down
On this picturesque town,
And we’re rubbing lots of oil on our skin.
Everyone’s here
And the kick off is near,
And we’re confident of getting a win.

¶ 24 Leave a comment on verse 24 0 The old people walking the sea front
Turn round and stare quite bemused.
Some of them grin
And say Depor will win,
Most of them look quite confused,
And we’ll put on a show
In two hours or so,
And we’re confident we’ll keep them amused.

¶ 25 Leave a comment on verse 25 0 The folk who arrived on the day trip
Have added to the size of the crowd.
We’ll cheer on the boys
And make plenty of noise,
Displaying our emotions out loud.
Win, lose or draw,
We will stand up and roar,
And we’re confident they’ll do the club proud.

¶ 26 Leave a comment on verse 26 0 Ollie’s Acclamation

¶ 27 Leave a comment on verse 27 0 Ollie crossed the pitch to us before the game began,
And everyone applauded Shelbourne’s greatest ever fan.
He looked so very tiny, as he stood way down below,
But as his name rang round the stands, I swear his head did grow.
Kick Off Haiku

¶ 28 Leave a comment on verse 28 0 Ref demands restart.
Ball tipped sideways not forwards.
Know you’re in trouble.

¶ 29 Leave a comment on verse 29 0 The First Half

¶ 30 Leave a comment on verse 30 0 Ten minutes gone and the match was still scoreless,
Our work rate terrific, our selflessness flawless.
Just keep them at bay for a few minutes longer,
They’ll get frustrated and we’ll become stronger.

¶ 31 Leave a comment on verse 31 0 Fifteen, then twenty, we’re losing possession,
But Depor can’t seem to make too much progression.
Their passing is slick and their movement incisive,
But our back four is sharp and the tackling decisive.

¶ 32 Leave a comment on verse 32 0 A half an hour gone, which was more than expected,
Our hesitant start has been nobly corrected.
The scoreboard’s still blank, to our utter elation,
And we’re urging the lads to maintain concentration.

¶ 33 Leave a comment on verse 33 0 Five minutes to half-time, a cross long and arc-ed,
With flowing precision finds Jayo unmarked.
His header’s on target, but doesn’t have power,
But at least we’re still level, things haven’t turned sour.

¶ 34 Leave a comment on verse 34 0 The whistle sounds shrill and the dream is still burning,
For hope is irrational and quite undiscerning.
Our performance exceeded all expectations,
And we’ve taken our place among footballing nations.

¶ 35 Leave a comment on verse 35 0 Egg and Chips

¶ 36 Leave a comment on verse 36 0 When Wes lost possession,
We all bit our lips,
And Victor’s aggression
Meant we’d had our chips.

¶ 37 Leave a comment on verse 37 0 Poor Jamie dithered
And gave too much space,
And Victor, elated,
Put egg on our face.

¶ 38 Leave a comment on verse 38 0 Unstoppable

¶ 39 Leave a comment on verse 39 0 If all our team were keepers
[And thank the Lord they’re not]
They’d all shout “Jeepers Creepers!”
As Victor took his shot.

¶ 40 Leave a comment on verse 40 0 Eleven stood together,
Prepared to stop the shot,
I’m very doubtful whether
They’d have kept it out or not.

¶ 41 Leave a comment on verse 41 0 Jayo’s Miss

¶ 42 Leave a comment on verse 42 0 A mistake at the back
And Jayo was clear,
All on his own
Without anyone near.
The ball sitting nicely,
The keeper advancing,
A lob o’er his head
Surely sends us all dancing.
The chip clears the keeper,
Our hearts have stopped beating,
We’ve started to crouch
To jump up off our seating.
But the angle’s oblique
And is grossly deceiving,
The ball’s high and wide
And we’re left disbelieving.
Defeat here in Spain
Might invoke desolation,
But a goal ‘gainst Depor
Would have been consolation.

¶ 43 Leave a comment on verse 43 0 The Sickener

¶ 44 Leave a comment on verse 44 0 The third goal was a bummer,
And was sickening because
Two nil made our summer,
The third removed the gloss.

¶ 45 Leave a comment on verse 45 0 I won’t pretend the scoreline
Was not what we deserved,
But if the two goal deficit
Had simply been preserved…

¶ 46 Leave a comment on verse 46 0 Coming of Age

¶ 47 Leave a comment on verse 47 0 Back in the Cross, when I was still young,
The Shels fans were always quite loudly outsung.
Our fan base was small and was not very vocal,
And would comfortably fit in the bar of the local.
Each team that we played always chanted much louder,
Their flags and their banners seemed larger and prouder.
They’d many more people who answered the call
[Except maybe Home Farm, who’d no fans at all]

¶ 48 Leave a comment on verse 48 0 But tonight at the Riazor, the Reds came of age,
And took their proud place on the world football stage,
A constant bombardment that drowned out the Spanish,
And caused those embarrassing memories to vanish.
A whole sea of red, waving, clapping and singing,
He home fans applauding the zest we were bringing.
To those that remember the bad days gone by,
It brought quite a sizable tear to the eye.

¶ 49 Leave a comment on verse 49 0 Addicted

¶ 50 Leave a comment on verse 50 0 Despite the result, the warm air still smelled sweet,
Rubbing shoulders with one of the famous elite.
Thirty five minutes away from sheer bliss,
I could easily get quite addicted to this.

¶ 51 Leave a comment on verse 51 0 We enjoyed every minute, the game was immense,
Great happiness shackled to worry intense,
As raw as a wound, yet as pure as a kiss,
I could easily get quite addicted to this.

¶ 52 Leave a comment on verse 52 0 The colour, the noise, the perfume of success,
The interest shown by the lads in the press,
The festive occasion, despite Jayo’s miss,
I could easily get quite addicted to this.

¶ 53 Leave a comment on verse 53 0 Our appetite’s whetted, we’re greedy for more,
We want to be part of the world football lore,
Not teetering o’er a financial abyss,
I could easily get quite addicted to this.