Fings Ain’t Wot They Used To Be!

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 With Inter’s Jose in the stand
Fings didn’t turn out how we planned
If we wanted to impress how hot we were
Ever since “The Special One” was cut loose
We’ve had: Big Phil, Avram and Guus
Fail abysmally to land us in the myrrh.

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 Our boys still mentally on the bus
That Magyar made right mugs of us
To put our neighbours first attempt away
As Cech missed every ball in flight
He almost punched out Ballack’s lights,
Whilst that right to Terry’s napper, tempted fate.

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 Our diamond wasn’t worth a carat
No cutting edge we failed to act
Until the second half and fings were looking grim
Then Drogba’s nut put one away
An unfortunate OG made our day
As Petr Cech, then did his best to let one in.

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 It wasn’t pretty, derbies ain’t
The Cottagers stifled us, and were patient
As an astute coach had done his work on us
We nicked three points, are still on top
Are we convincing? No we’re not
And we’ll miss The Drog, who’s at The African Nation Cup.

5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 I’ve gotta say I’ve been well impressed
By four or five of the teams we’ve met
The big four’s gone, there’re five sides looking flush
It’s not for me to say, who’s in the frame
But as the competition heats up within our game.
In “The Football” I’d say fings are on the up.



In a typical full on West London derbie yesterday, I’d have to say we were fortunate…again. As a realist there’s no point in saying the suns shining when every fan and their uncle can clearly see that it’s raining cats and dogs.

We’ve been lucky so far and The Special One and his sidekick, sat up in the stands(sic) jotting down notes, prior to us meeting Inter Milan home and away in the Champions League, will have spotted and noted our achilles heel in defence, of that you can be sure and no mistake.

Mourhino is sure to be guaranteed one hell of a welcome on his return to Stamford Bridge for the cup tie, as he left so quickly the last time we, the fans never got the chance to say addios amigo, adieu or whatever the Portuguese is for au revior mon ami!

I fully expect to see him (Mourinho) back again, as a coach, on these shores next season, loathe, love or hate him, our game needs real up front in yer face personalities like him who tell it how it is and he’s been sorely missed.

Wonderful to see the competition hotting up in the Premiership. I reckon four or five teams could make it a really interesting second half to the season and at long last threaten the big four’s dominance, which after all is not a healthy situation for a so called competitive sport or is it?

A Happy and Preposterous New Year You All!



Source: http://footballpoets.org/poems/fings-aint-wot-they-used-to-be/