What did we have before goalposts
did players have to put jumpers down
and who decided to toss a coin
I bet it was a farthing or half a crown ?
And who invented football boots
did they play before in bare feet
and who came up with corner flags
as you have to admit they’re kind of neat ?
Then who had a eureka moment
saying:”these goals they need a net”
and was it a bloke called William Hill
who became the first to have a bet ?
When the first player made a bad tackle
by going into his opponent really hard,
was someone watching thinking to himself,
“if it was up to me I’d have given him a red card.”
And when did they create the penalty kick
was it for those who liked to dive and cheat
and before we played on football pitches
were all matches contested on the street ?
But where would we be without these ideas
those smart inventions still used to day ?
Yet for me the cleverest of the lot
has to be the magical free kick spray !