We might not have the pseudonyms that used to grace the game.
But do we really need them? After all – they were quite lame.
‘The Golden Boy’ I ask you, the whole tenor now sound foreign.
Pray tell what nickname could improve the name Jermaine McSporran?
To call someone a ‘Tractor Boy’ would seem a silly gamble.
Particularly if the lad’s already Titus Bramble.
Remember Perry Digweed? Could there be a better name?
‘The Gardening Custodian’ just doesn’t sound the same.
Those nicknames came from a ‘Boys Own’ world of heroes and ginger beer.
Made for Pathe News and the wireless. They are gone for good I fear.