Hugh and Cry

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 On the First of April
in old Kirkcaldy town,
a doctor at the hospital
creased brow with worried frown..
It was Saturday afternoon
and Mrs Morris was in labour,
but with husband at a football match,
had been brought in by a neighbour…

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 Upon the stroke of three o’ clock
came a screeching wail,
as doctor took delivery
of a bawling baby male..
Soon they sent a messenger
to Raith Rovers’ football ground,
passing on solicitation
for the father to be found…

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 ‘Twas announced by loudspeaker,
“Mr Morris, you’re a Dad!”
the father turned to all his mates
and cried, “I’m really glad!!
I must go t’ th’ hospital
quickly as I can..”
so an hour later at full-time,
along the road he ran…

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 When eyes lit on bonnie bairn
he almost wept for joy,
took off his Raith Rovers scarf
and wrapped it round the boy..
Then to his betrothed he said,
“Our son’s name must rhyme with ‘blue’,
th’ colours o’ our foo’ball team,
so let’s call him Hugh…”

5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 Took whisky bottle from coat pocket,
chortling to his wife,
“Och aye, tell y’ lassie,
’tis best day o’ m’ life!
Noo we ha’ our ain wee lad..”
he paused to drink his fill,
“An’ t’ put icin’ on th’ birthday cake..
Rovers won four-nil!!!”

6 Leave a comment on verse 6 0 Outside twinkling stars shone down
upon that joyous night,
including one which glowed so large
it filled the room with light..
“Bless m’ soul!” cried the Mum,
“‘Tis like the Birth in Bethlehem..”
“Nae chance o’ that,” the Dad replied,
“Kirkca’dy doesna ha’ three wise men…”



Following the publication of “Who’s Hugh”, I have been persuaded to post selected extracts from the Hugh Morris memoirs, “Hugh’s Private Parts”. Above is an excerpt from Chapter 1.

Source: http://footballpoets.org/poems/hugh-and-cry/