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Ireland versus Switzerland, the match was very tight,
Though Shay in goal had hardly had a shot to save all night.
Finnan, Breen and Cunningham, the mighty John O’Shea
Had worked extremely hard to keep the Swiss attack at bay.
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Then suddenly from out the tunnel charged a herd of cattle.
With ringing bells they seemed intent on joining in the battle.
They stampeded straight at our defence who didn’t stand a chance,
Obviously unprepared for such a circumstance.
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Well, they chased them and they caught them and they squashed them in the dirt,
They trampled with their flailing hooves – I’m sure it must have hurt,
They mashed them and they bashed them and they ground them in the mud,
Till our defence consisted of a mass of flesh and blood.
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The ref got out the rulebook but was quite uncertain which
Chapter dealt with herds of cattle charging on the pitch.
The Swiss could not believe their luck and waltzed right through to score,
Which manifestly shows the dangers of a flat back four.