If you feel the worlds against you
As you struggle through the game
Take a deep breath, try and be sensible
It’s nowt but a passing (sic) phase!&%!
If assistant hoists his flag high
Though the offside trap was sprung
Then officialdom ignore your pleas of why?
When the full time whistle comes.
If your keeper and defender
Ain’t speaking the same tongue
As the under-dogs at Wemberly
Nick the spoils and win two-one.
If the injured list is getting long
As the yellow cards are raised
And away fans sing their tawdry songs
Even though their teams outplayed.
If the beautiful passing game you play
Isn’t finishing (sic) up in goals
Take it on the chin, it’s just not your day
As per draw against the O’s
If the stout have turned and faced away
When the free kicks rain on in
Even though your centre forward swears he’s great
He’s forgot the art of scoring.
If your captain speaks of lucrative moves
Through The London Evening News
As his agent looks for pastures new
To San Siro or Camp Nou.
If in the space of a fortnight
You’ve been humbled in two Cups
Turn the other cheek, next up it’s Man United
And there’s still time to catch them up.
If the peak is there within your reach
As the team above drop points
You’ll stick with the style of play you preach
Like the Emirate punters want.
If Cesc don’t do the business
And Arshavin’s having a ‘mare’
Look skyward as Gods your witness
Better that, than to stand and swear.
If the fourth official looks away
As you plead your case in vain
Kick the magic sponge, get Pat Rice to play
He’d be grateful of one more game.
If your season should take the turn toward winning
And them Manc’s are overcome
Be sure to savour every minute, wallowing in ’em.
As worthy champs….. Mr Wenger son!