The early exchanges,
Ball pinging around,
Possession conceded needlessly,
Ball sliced out of play.
First event of note,
Pizza-faced ref calls for shovel;
Play halted as clumps of dog s–t
Are heaved off the pitch.
Sweeping move finds
The opposition’s predatory striker
Who shoots low and thumps the post.
A lucky escape! Still 0-0.
Ball hoofed aimlessly upfield
For bout of head tennis.
Then belted into nearby garden.
No real improvement as Pizza
Blows his whistle soundlessly.
Water gulped down
Ready now, prepared.
Second 45 starts
With ball blast in the b——–s.
Doubled up in agony
Whilst others look on, doubled up in mirth.
This painful blow as nothing
To opponent’s opening goal;
High cross, keeper fumbles
ball trundles tiredly into unguarded net.
Straining every sinew
To get the equaliser.
geeing up team-mates
On their last legs.
Tension mounts, tackles fly in.
Everyone deadly serious now, focused.
Pizza looks once, twice
At Mickey Mouse wrist watch.
Out of nowhere a fight.
Late tackle results in blur of pushing, shoving.
Not really serious, though,
Just handbags at 10 paces.
Final minute – a corner:
21 players packed into opposition penalty area.
Cross drilled over, flicked on at near post,
Ball headed across goal and in!
Moment of sheer, unbridled joy!
Players leaping around
Like demented Morris dancers.
Pleat-like, coach dances a jig on the pitch.