Think I’ll have a bath and an early night
got a big game away tomorrow
meeting the lads outside the pub
coach arriving eight a.m. sharp.
Struggling to get to sleep though
how I hate these relegation battles
should be used to them by now
seeing it’s becoming a regular thing.
Tired but I get there on time
the three of us get on the coach
every seat is now occupied
we must be the last pick up point.
Some are opening their cans already
an hour later the singing starts
on the way other coaches pass us
thumbs are raised to each other.
Thankfully the driver makes a stop
bladders are now at bursting point
someone has blocked up the toilet
“ten minutes and all back on,” he shouts.
We’re off and on our way again
only another 150 miles we’re told
two papers read and crossword attempted
so stare out of the window now then.
Eventually we arrive near to the ground
so plenty of time to see the sights
we all head off to the nearest watering hole
some are already unsteady on their feet.
Refreshed and fed we are on the march again
two and a half thousand behind the goal
you’d think we were going for the title
not battling for survival again.
The team huff and puff for ninety minutes
and somehow come away with a point
other results have been kind to us
so we live to fight another day.
A fortnight later it’s the final game
it’s away and we have to win it
so it’s a bath and an early night
how I hate these relegation battles.