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The Cheat Is On

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 I can’t condone Delias ‘How to Cheat’
I’d like to read Roeders ‘How to Beat’
Delia raves about ready made mash
When what we want is instant cash

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 No guilt is laid on frozen dishes
Nil-nil played out on frozen pitches
Wooden spoon made from Formica
Delia, please serve up a striker

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 Delia recommends meat in tins
We’re recycled tripe, no sign of wins
Don’t cook, go for self-assembly
In my book, we won’t get to Wembley

18

Notes

Delia teaches us that piling packet mash onto tinned meat is ‘Shepherds Pie’. Meanwhile, her team are made into mincemeat and pile on the agony. Relegation but a blip away.

STOP PRESS: Norwich 5 Colchester 1. And no cheating! Perhaps we’re not doomed after all! All these lovely ‘ifs’ and ‘buts’ – where would we be without them…

Source: http://footballpoets.org/poems/the-cheat-is-on/