Football Poets

The Monster that ate Football

¶ 1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 We used to go out every week at the same time
to watch our club
Now there’s a game on television,
24 seven down at the pub.

¶ 2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 You used to be able to plan your week,
so that Saturday was for the ‘footie’
Now we have to wait ‘til Sunday afternoon,
for ‘champers and a prawn buttie’

¶ 3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 Your team could be playing on Monday night, Saturday ‘noon’,
and sometimes in between
As long as the Electronic ‘pitch-side’ advert boards,
are shown on every screen
‘own your own house abroad’ an ‘exotic holiday’
or even a ‘brand new car’
Me, I just want to watch the game and grab a beer,
at half time down in the bar

¶ 4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 Now we have ‘technical areas’,
‘formations’, ‘statistics’ and an almost ‘instant replay’
We didn’t need any of this ‘clever’ stuff,
when there was just ‘Match of the Day’

¶ 5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 There’s ‘transfer windows’, ‘squad numbers’
and even worse there’s ‘squad rotation’
Clubs with ‘brand new’ grounds
and ‘massive debt’ and some in ‘administration’

¶ 6 Leave a comment on verse 6 0 There are footballers all over the world,
in pink boots, with matching gloves and tights
The state of some them makes you wonder,
what they wear to go out at night
There’s ‘bandanas’, earrings, ‘autobiographies’,
‘tattoos’ and ‘super-agents’
And after tapping the ball into an ‘empty’ net,
there’s well rehearsed ‘celebrations’

¶ 7 Leave a comment on verse 7 0 ‘Media training’, ‘official statements’, ‘mutual consent’
and an ‘Undisclosed’ transfer fee
The ‘fourth official’ and ‘Referee’s assistant’,
(that’s a ‘liner’ to you and me)
‘Club websites’ and ‘message boards’,
‘Sky Sports News’ all keep us in the ‘know’
What happened to the days, when all we had,
was a ‘Radio phone-in show’

¶ 8 Leave a comment on verse 8 0 There are lots of strange ‘new’ injuries around,
‘metatarsal’ springs to mind
I don’t remember ‘Besty’ breaking one of them,
or any of his kind
Now there’s a Premier League, a Champions League
and a ‘sponsored’ FA Cup
English clubs have American, Russian and Arabic owners,
where will it all finish up?

¶ 9 Leave a comment on verse 9 0 There are lots of changes to our game,
since the day it was invented
Some good, some bad, some ‘not quite there’,
some totally demented
But the biggest change the whole world wide,
is the worst change of all
Now that Television runs our game,
it’s become the ‘Monster that ate Football’

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