The Very First Football Match

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 The very first match that in Ireland took place,
Happened way back in thirteen sixteen.
In the county Kildare in a town they call Naas,
‘Twixt the landlords and plebs on the green.

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 The landlords were rich and all English by birth,
Athletic and really well bred,
The peasants, however, ate handfuls of earth
And only twice weekly got fed.

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 To settle a quarrel, they worked out the rules,
To which both the parties agreed.
To kick a pig’s bladder between two small stools,
The winner would thus be decreed.

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 The landlords were fav’rites to wallop the proles,
And there was no upset in store.
They racked up a record of eighty six goals,
While the poor, starving peasants got four.

5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 Nobody thought that the sport would improve,
And become so incredibly big,
Till somebody had the idea to remove
The bladder from out of the pig.



Naas is pronounced to rhyme with face.

These events may or may not be true. My research has been minimal.

Source: http://footballpoets.org/poems/the-very-first-football-match/