Third Place Playoff – Germany 3 Portugal 1
For Oliver Kahn and Luis Figo
The final turning of the page
For two great heroes of our age.
The final bow upon the stage,
As far as we can rightly gauge.
From Reykjavik to sunny Perth,
These two colossi strode the earth.
The final score had little worth
Amid the sorrow and the mirth.
So football takes another twist,
Another two crossed off the list.
And though great hopes and dreams exist,
Oh yes, they will be sorely missed.
The Worst Centre Forward of the Tournament?
They say Big Phil’s a decent coach,
A master of direct approach.
So it’s quite puzzling how he’d let a
Team be led by poor Pauleta.
His record’s actually quite good,
So his inclusion’s understood.
But in Germany, you never met a
Worse lone striker than Pauleta.
This feller had no ball control,
And could not play with back to goal.
No wonder he could only net a
Single goal, could poor Pauleta.
The Portuguese made boring viewing,
Lack of goals was their undoing.
Big Phil should have had a tête-á-
Tête with out-of-form Pauleta.
Defenders and midfielders, they
Are blessed with hundreds every day,
But surely Portugal could get a
Better striker than Pauleta?
Every ball he miscontrolled,
One hundred and eight, I’m told.
Sure the team would be much better
Off with Granny, than Pauleta.
Nuno Gomez kicked his heels,
While half the population kneels.
On the bench, this cool goal-getter
Must have wondered ‘bout Pauleta.