The no smoking signs in heaven
have been taken down today,
as God informs St Peter,
that Big Mal is on his way.
“We’ll have to bend the rules a bit,
this man has such an aura,
find a cloud for his sheepskin coat,
and a hook for that fedora.
Also Pete, when you get a chance,
will you ice up the champagne,
I’ve a feeling heaven, that we know
will never be the same.
The women angels they’ll flock to him,
that you can be sure,
and I believe the news has already reached,
the ears of Bobby Moore.
Already down in earthdom
he’s been mourned in towns and Shires
and especially in South London
where they called him “The Messiah.”
Warn him of his language Pete,
he’s known as quite a curser,
and to make him feel much more at home,
put him next to old Joe Mercer.
Let them coach our coming match,
the derby game v Hell,
remember they discovered
the likes of Colin Bell.”
So Big Mal lands up in heaven
and doesn’t miss a beat,
as he tells God to “move over,
I think you’re in my seat.
You’ve been up here for ever ,
It’s a feat I do admire,
But you must remember one thing God,
Their’s only one MESSIAH.”