He’s not There

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 Nobody told us about him,
About his forked tongue.
And no-one warned that before long,
He would be up and gone.
But it’s too late for weeping buckets,
Chewing carpets, tearing out hair.
Though we’ve searched high and low for him,
He’s not there!

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 Well, let me tell you ‘bout his blist’ring pace,
His cheeky baby face,
His style, his skill, his flair.
Those cracking goals he scored,
He could not be ignored,
But he’s not there!

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 Now we all thought that he meant it,
When he said that he’d stay.
Kidded ourselves we could trust him,
That he’d not go away.
But our eyes have now been opened,
A harsh lesson we have been taught:
Everyone can fall for Silver,
Can be bought…

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 Oh, let me tell you ‘bout his golden boots,
How he would twist, turn, shoot,
Cause awestruck folk to stop and stare.
Deadly with right or left,
And quite good with his head,
But he’s not there!

5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 And we all thought we’d forget him,
As years went slowly by.
Were sure the wound would cease hurting,
That our pain would subside.
But we’re all sat here a-moping,
And complaining that Life’s not fair.
‘Cos we still can’t quite believe that…
He’s not there!

6 Leave a comment on verse 6 0 For I assure you, he was dynamite,
When dressed in Blue and White,
A little diamond rare.
He swore that he’d be true,
Then signed up with Man U,
Is he all there?
Denys E. W. Jones



To mark the second anniversary of Wayne Rooney’s transfer to Manchester United, here is a re-working of a song by The Zombies entitled She’s not There.

Source: https://footballpoets.org/poems/hes-not-there/