There were tee-shirts in the turnstile queues
There were summer shorts parked on seats
When Manch United flew in to to play the Blues
After Wednesday night’s, Barca, Nou Camp retreat.
After Joey Cole hit the upright
Events became bizarre
As Nemanja Vidic’s dental work
Took a hefty whack from Didier Drogba’s calf .
Then Ballack headed us one nil up
From Drogba’s pinpoint cross
T’was strange to see a pass like that
Between two blokes, who apparantly don’t get on.
Ricky must have got a telephone call
From someone up above
As Rooney ran on to a madness ball
To dispatch past Petr’s glove.
As a dodgy free kick came our way
And a row flared up, out on the turf
It cracks me up, even today to have to say,
Those involved both wore blue shirts.
Mcheal Essien couldn’t believe it
Pulled his shirt over his face and laughed
As he watched two mega egoed eejits
Like spoilt kids, acting daft.
Then Michaeal Carrick conceded a pen
Trying to act as a Manc defender
Was it nailed on? I could’nt see just then
So I’ll plead the Arsene Wenger.
There was pandomonium in the plastic seats
As the mind games came in to play
Then Edwin Van Der Saar got a yellow card
As he tried to save the day.
Amidst the furore and madness
Amongst twenty two commited men
Up stepped the type of bloke, you want to see poke
In yer vital spot kicks, so let a German take yer pens.
Owen Hargreaves was physically asssulted
And as he lay there prone and numb
Up came Rio Ferdinand, and not once but twice
Kicked his own team mate, squarely on the bum!
As boiling point was on the way
The final whistle went
And forty one thousand plus worn out fans
Were somewhat quiet, totally vocally spent.
Then Rio Ferdinand kicked a stewardess
He thought looked like a wall
And that after kicking lumps out of Owen Hargreaves a..e
He’d presumed looked a like a ball?
After Joey Cole had slung his shirt in the crowd
Owen Hargreaves lost his nut
As “One Step Beyond” sang out through the tannoys loud
Twenty thousand sun kissed punters… did a total Madness strut!