The Ballad of Richard O’Shea
¶ 1
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The fighting suspended,
The Civil War ended,
And football was dandy and gay.
A centre half came
Who thought hard ‘bout the game,
And his name, it was Richard O’Shea.
¶ 2
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He was stocky and stout
And his jersey hung out,
And he played for St James’s Gate ‘A’.
Although he was round,
He was tactically sound,
Was this centre-half Richard O’Shea.
¶ 3
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He would work out smart tricks
When his team got free kicks,
Devising each intricate play.
The other team learnt
To be wary, but weren’t
Quite as clever as Richard O’Shea.
¶ 4
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He produced one great move
To historically prove,
That he was the man of his day.
When a free kick was given,
His team-mates were driven
To call upon Richard O’Shea.
¶ 5
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He stood outside the box
And he pulled up his socks,
Then he moved all his players away,
And positioned them round
Different parts of the ground
Like a general, did Richard O’Shea.
¶ 6
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Then he drove the free straight
At his own number eight,
Whom it hit without any delay.
Like a pinball it flew
To their own number two,
As determined by Richard O’Shea.
¶ 7
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From him it deflected,
As Rick had suspected,
To the other side’s open dismay,
Straight onto the spine
Of his own number nine,
Positioned by Richard O’Shea.
¶ 8
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It cannoned off him
(As worked out in the gym)
Straight into the goal. Hip, hooray!
Their opponents were stunned,
So completely outgunned
By the marvellous Richard O’Shea.
¶ 9
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And after the game,
They came up with a name
For this masterful free-kick display.
Everybody agreed
It was fitting indeed
To call it a great Rick O’Shea.
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