Inside the mind of the school team goalie.
¶ 1
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Feel so proud at the age of ten,
cos I’ve fullfilled my dream,
I’m named as starting goalie,
for my school football team.
¶ 2
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I see myself as an international,
when I play — in the playground,
cos I am in the school team,
and new found fame I’ve found.
¶ 3
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I get to leave school early,
when a game away we play
upsetting my un-sporting teacher,
but there’s nothing he can say.
¶ 4
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I gaze into the future,
and see I’m a superstar,
so goodbye to my history books,
farewell to algebra.
¶ 5
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I dream of saving free kicks,
that are swerved in, placed and curled,
as I head home after school
to my secret practice world.
¶ 6
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I can’t play in the garden,
because usually rain is lashin,
but in my tiny bedroom
I’m Gordon Banks and Yashin.
¶ 7
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A tennis ball against the wall,
and I dive for the rebound,
trying at the same time
not to make a sound.
¶ 8
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My six yard box which I command
is the battered little bed,
softer than the pavement
where I often bled.
¶ 9
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Neighbours peering over,
convinced that I am wacko,
but I’m only emulating
my Palace hero Jacko.
¶ 10
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I fantazise I’m playing
for Palace in the cup,
and Chelsea get a penalty
and Osgood he steps up.
¶ 11
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He looks at first to place it,
but then decides to rip it,
as I dive across my mattress
and around the bed-post tip it.
¶ 12
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My autograph is practiced
for two hours every night
changing it around,
until I get it right.
¶ 13
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In eight years time they’ll refer to me,
as the up and coming Shilton,
as I hang out with the stars
and crash out at the Hilton.
¶ 14
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The school keepers jersey
was a polo neck of wool,
and when I had it on
I thought I looked so cool.
¶ 15
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School emblem displayed
proudly on the chest,
I was ready for Pele,
Eusebio and Best.
¶ 16
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I’m still not very tall,
and I cannot touch the bar,
and despite my hardest efforts,
my goal kicks don’t go far.
¶ 17
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All the goals had puddles
the pitches all huge slopes,
you could be 6-0 down at half-time
and if you’re down-hill still have hopes.
¶ 18
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There was no net or onion bag,
to bulge when someone scored
and periods of inactivity
often left you bored.
¶ 19
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You’re praying for a shot to save
when you’re well ahead,
but when the game is even,
another shot you dread.
¶ 20
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The rival schools hard men,
congregate behind your goal,
warning you to let one,
through your fingers roll.
¶ 21
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These threats at times could be,
difficult to ignore,
but there’s no way —- in the world
you’re goin to let them score.
¶ 22
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Because we’re only ten,
the game only lasts an hour,
with half an orange at half-time,
for vitamin C and power.
¶ 23
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We won the Croydon league that year,
of my young life, the highlight,
but at sixteen there was no Palace
only a dirty building site.
¶ 24
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So what I’m trying to say young chaps,
is listen up to me,
just because your’e good in goal
don’t quit on history.
¶ 25
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Nor English, Maths or Geography,
cos they’re all your future tools.
because for every Nigel Martyn
there’s a hundred thousand fools.
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