Football Poets

JOHN ( the shovel ) SEWELL. an awfully civilised defender.

¶ 1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 He resembled a middle-aged bank manager,
not a team captain from that era,
but to all of Crystal Palace fans,
he was our Bobby Moore or Shearer.

¶ 2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 His name was John ( the shovel ) Sewell,
and his position was right back,
a crisp and tidy tackler,
who often moved up in attack.

¶ 3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 Signed from neighbours Charlton,
for an Eleven Thousand fee,
his debut was v Bristol Rovers,
in October 63.

¶ 4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 The fans they called him ‘Shovel,’
it was shouted with devotion,
and his finest moment came in 69,
when he led us to promotion.

¶ 5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 He was only ever booked once,
when he accidentally clipped a heel,
but Bert Head wrote in for leniency,
and the F.A agreed to his appeal.

¶ 6 Leave a comment on verse 6 0 However —– it was his equalizing goal v Leeds,
that the Palace hoardes remember,
as he latched onto a pass from Scott,
who was filling in for Kember.

¶ 7 Leave a comment on verse 7 0 ” HOOF IT IN THERE, ” screamed the crowd,
as in the box he sent her,
and if he’d been a Brazilian,
you’d have sworn to God, he’d bent her.

¶ 8 Leave a comment on verse 8 0 The ball hung lazily in the air,
and took a little swerve,
and poor Gary Sprake in the United goal,
seemed to lose his nerve.

¶ 9 Leave a comment on verse 9 0 First he thought to punch it,
then he went to catch,
and he made a total cock up,
of the last kick of the match.

¶ 10 Leave a comment on verse 10 0 As the ball dropped slowly in the net,
Selhurst Park let out a roar,
and ‘ the Shovels’ name was carved out,
forever in folklore.

¶ 11 Leave a comment on verse 11 0 But ‘ the Shovel’ was getting older,
and he was struggling with the pace,
and sometimes he got the run-around,
from young wingers he would face.

¶ 12 Leave a comment on verse 12 0 John’s contribution to the Palace cause,
was still recognised as huge,
and the Board gave him a send off,
with a Testimonial match v Bruges.

¶ 13 Leave a comment on verse 13 0 He was transferred onto Orient,
where he enjoyed an Eight month stay,
then he joined a Euro exodus,
bound for the U.S.A.

¶ 14 Leave a comment on verse 14 0 He could have joined the Cosmos,
or the Philadelphia Fury,
but instead he headed West,
to St Louis in Missouri.

¶ 15 Leave a comment on verse 15 0 He became the STARS player manager,
and won coach of the year,
and he became a living legend,
in the City famed for beer.

¶ 16 Leave a comment on verse 16 0 John got used to all the razzmatazz,
cheer girls and astro turf,
and he followed with the franchise,
when they became the California Surf.

¶ 17 Leave a comment on verse 17 0 He’s now living somewhere near L.A.
that town of dudes and geeks,
and last I heard he was doing well,
with a business in antiques.

¶ 18 Leave a comment on verse 18 0 The business name is ‘AWFULLY CIVILISED’,
a name that fits John like a shoe,
cos that’s exactly what he was,
OUR GALLANT NUMBER TWO.