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Flag and Whistle

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 They arrive armed with a flag and whistle
To officiate at Torquay United or even Partick Thistle
The men in black they used to be….
When all games kicked of on Saturdays at three

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 A team themselves, a ref and two linos
Have to be as thick skinned as a herd of rhinos
Check their watches, wont forget the coin
Ask the two captains at the centre spot to join

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 Down the currency comes, one team wins the toss
The man with the coin, “Don’t forget I’m the boss!”
The game starts with a formidable blast….
And, no doubt that one will not be the last

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 A 40,000 crowd vent their anger at a decision
As he does not seem to be showing much precision
His wife, that morning, for sandwiches he would thank her
Now chanted at as something that rhymes with tanker

5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 20 minutes and they are baying for his blood
When, in the penalty area, a player lands with a thud
Theatrically, arms waving as he comes to ground
But then not following the necessary whistling sound

6 Leave a comment on verse 6 0 Linesman does not escape the wrath at his ear
A lot louder for him, to the crowd he is very near
His parenthood is questioned, his family derided
As the manager of the offended becomes very excited

7 Leave a comment on verse 7 0 Profanity rules the air, it is heavy with offence
As Sir Trevor Brooking squats firmly astride his fence
After ten times in the studio on the slo mo
“It was a clear penalty, the defender he has to go!”

8 Leave a comment on verse 8 0 Half time confrontation as they leave the pitch
To flatten him the the red faced manager has an itch
Stonewall silence only turns up the heat
Of the footballers with designer boots on their valued feet

9 Leave a comment on verse 9 0 Tea and whatever in their own dressing room
Like the last supper before they meet their doom
Undaunted out they come for the second half
Some fans would like to strangle them with a club scarf

10 Leave a comment on verse 10 0 Ugly faces of both sexes spew their displeasure
Part of the way they enjoy their weekend leisure
They had done their best with little disparity
As it was a freindly game with all proceeds going to charity

Source: http://footballpoets.org/poems/flag-and-whistle/