S.S.England
¶ 1
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The S.S.England, badly holed,
Sailed slowly into port.
Upon the heaving waves she rolled,
The shell-shocked crew distraught.
¶ 2
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And as the harbour wall appeared,
To strident exclamations,
The waiting crowd all clapped and cheered
Sincere commiserations.
¶ 3
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The admiral, with egg-shaped head,
Described the crew as plucky.
Unlucky to be hit, he said,
So desperately unlucky.
¶ 4
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The captain held his head up high,
Dismissing any shame,
And in a loud voice did decry
The man who was to blame.
¶ 5
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No post-mortem need be held,
No need to call a coroner.
The dying ship’s last breath expelled
The name of Johnny Foreigner.
¶ 6
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Once again, brave Englishmen
Did not get their reward.
They fired a strident broadside, then
The press went overboard.
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