Shels 0 Rovers 2
¶ 1
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Driving home with the young lad beside me,
All the lights flashing by in the dark,
And we don’t say a word,
For our minds have been blurred
By the game we watched in Tolka Park.
¶ 2
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Our forwards were constantly thwarted,
Our defence looked unsound and unsure,
And we tended to yield
Quite a lot in midfield –
Thank God Shamrock Rovers were poor.
¶ 3
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Conversation is stilted and awkward,
And our long mouths can’t run to a smile,
And the DJ says, “Folks,
I’m gonna tell you some jokes…”
And the two of us reach for the dial.
¶ 4
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The ref was a total disaster,
No wonder he got such abuse.
The poor sod, all night long
Got so many things wrong,
But that’s hardly a valid excuse.
¶ 5
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I slow down and stop at an amber,
And the young feller shoots me a glance.
But I stare straight ahead
With a look of pure dread,
And my unblinking eyes in a trance.
¶ 6
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And of course, quelle surprise, their two scorers –
It had to be Haylock and Keddy.
Dear God, why those two?
Can you give us a clue?
As if our wounds were not salted already.
¶ 7
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Oh, play me some sweet Leonard Cohen,
Give me something morose by Lou Reed.
I need some Portishead
To wake me from the dead,
And to give me the lift that I need.
¶ 8
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If the ref had played one hour extra,
We wouldn’t have soiled their clean sheet,
For, try as we might,
It was just not our night,
And they made our black sorrow complete.
¶ 9
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The young lad stares out of the window,
As the car bounces into the drive.
He’s unlucky, I think,
I can have a stiff drink,
But he gets no help to survive.
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