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The Rob Styles Files (2)

mark merriman

Sunday, March 30th, 2008

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 This afternoon I’ve got a game –
Man City v the Blues;
a trip up to the Midlands
to quaint old Saint Andrews.

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 Before the game I wash my hair,
apply a little gel;
quick check in the mirror,
must admit I’m looking swell.

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 Then I don my reffing kit –
this afternoon it’s green;
final check in looking glass
to make doubly sure I’m clean.

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 Early in the second half
and Birmingham two up;
I feel quite sorry for City
so decide to even it up.

5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 City player goes down in box;
it’s striker Benjani;
I send off Blues’ Queudrue
and award a penalty.

6 Leave a comment on verse 6 0 It’s 2-1 now to Birmingham,
but I’m not finished yet.
A clash inside the area –
a penalty? You bet!

7 Leave a comment on verse 7 0 McSheffrey was taken out
by City’s Sun Ji Hai;
some say ’twas accidental,
others that he took a dive.

8 Leave a comment on verse 8 0 After the game I wash my hair,
apply a little Lynx.
Now I feel a trifle tired,
might lie down for 40 winks.

9 Leave a comment on verse 9 0 Later as I watch the game,
Football First on Sky,
the second pen looks dodgy –
I really cannot lie.

10 Leave a comment on verse 10 0 But I can’t believe the gall
of City manager Sven.
How dare he criticise me!
Now I’m glad I gave a pen.

11 Leave a comment on verse 11 0 Players make mistakes
all the flamin’ time,
but I’m castigated, pilloried
for just one petty crime.

© mark merriman sept 2004

Notes

Have you ever seen a worst decision (apart from the one he awarded against Jamie Carragher)? A quite appalling referee!

Source: http://footballpoets.org/poems/the-rob-styles-files-2/