Three Teams Worse Than We Are
¶ 1
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At least we’ll be here a year from now because
there’s three teams worse than we are
who deserve to go down.
¶ 2
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You can park your bus in our midfield,
drive a tractor through our defence.
Slalom freely our wide-open flanks,
test our goalkeeper’s positional sense.
¶ 3
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We’ve failed to replace our ageing stars,
and our recruitment policy is a farce.
Our tactics have lost the plot,
and our corridor of uncertainty runs box to box.
¶ 4
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We’re rubbish and we know it,
but there’s three teams worse than we are
who deserve to go down.
¶ 5
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Trouble is, every time we say those words,
they come with a creeping sense of doubt.
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