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Senhor Mourinho expounds his Philosophy

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 Well, hi there, English football fans,
I’m sure you’ve heard of me.
José’s my name, let me explain
My strange philosophee:

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 Just give me a safe pair of hands,
And five defenders true.
Then four brave boys to hold midfield,
Up front one man will do.

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 A one-nil win is my ideal,
A goalless draw is fine.
The thought of scoring more than two
Sends shivers down my spine.

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 If Ten Goal Payne were in my team,
I’d flog ‘im double quick,
And sign some star custodian
To stand between the sticks.

5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 Five-four? That’s an ice hockey score!
Six-nil? You’re talking tennis…
Let’s make it one, don’t mention fun,
‘Cos soccer’s serious bizness.

6 Leave a comment on verse 6 0 At Porto I was mastermind,
We soared to dizzy heights.
Now I’m the Boss at Stamford Bridge,
The Title’s in our sights.

7 Leave a comment on verse 7 0 Though once or twice we’ve racked up four,
I swear, ‘twas a mistake.
A one-goal-lead is all you need,
One strike is all it takes…

8 Leave a comment on verse 8 0 8/1/05
Denys E. W. Jones

Notes

I really should have written this one last November, straight after José described Spurs 4 Arsenal 5 as an “ice hockey score”… Younger readers may not remember Ten Goal Payne: Joe Payne scored ten goals on 13th April 1936, when Luton beat Bristol Rovers 12-0.

Source: https://footballpoets.org/poems/senhor-mourinho-expounds-his-philosophy/