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Were You Up for Portillo?

Denys E. W. Jones

Sunday, July 12th, 2026

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 Were you up for Portillo?
No, I was sleeping soundly,
Head resting on my pillow.

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 Did you stay up for Mexico?
My answer once again is no,
For early next day had to work to go.

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 Then what about the Norway match?
Did you miss that one too?
I did not have to work next day,

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 So I tuned in to ITV,
I saw the Vikings take the lead,
Then Bellingham fire home his fifth.

5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 Soon after came the half-time break,
And there was I still wide awake,
Yet strong, hot cup of tea did brew for safety’s sake.

6 Leave a comment on verse 6 0 Another forty-five got under way,
From end to end the action ebbed and flowed.
Chances came and went, but no more goals.

7 Leave a comment on verse 7 0 ‘Twas now the very witching time of night,
When normally I am tucked up in bed,
But no way was I missing Extra Time.

8 Leave a comment on verse 8 0 Already penalties were in my thoughts,
But not in Saviour Jude’s –
A short time after play resumed, his sixth he scored.

9 Leave a comment on verse 9 0 The final score I’m sure’s known to you all –
The Lads held on to win the match two-one,
Then joined the fans to belt out Wonderwall.

10 Leave a comment on verse 10 0 12/7/2026
Denys E. W. Jones

Notes

Sunday 12th July 2026, England 2 Norway 1. Younger readers might not understand the title of this poem. So, the question Were you up for Portillo is asking if, back in May 1997, I was watching Election Night Special, when around three o’clock in the morning it was announced that the Conservative MP, Michael Portillo had lost his seat. Since then, at every genny ‘lec, people have hoped to witness another “Portillo Moment”. The rest of this poem should be clear.

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Source: https://footballpoets.org/poems/were-you-up-for-portillo/