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Gareth Southgate’s Beard

Crispin Thomas

Saturday, July 7th, 2018

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 he used to be compared sometimes
to Gobbo out of Noddy
he’d stand their all close shaven
his look was never shoddy
it came together suddenly
it altered points of view
a manager type masterstroke
brought facial fuzz to view

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 the razor went on gard’ning leave
in two thousand fifteen
a tactical adjustment
it burst upon the scene
and though it shocked the media
and some fans found it weird
it suddenly went viral
Gareth Southgate’s beard

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 it’s trending with his waistcosts
on ev’ry top platform
from Vogue to railways stations
his beardiness performs
on Instagram he’s everywhere
in bars and in cafés
the coolest men among us
adopt his furry ways
it’s grooming at its finest
he combs it sipping tea
he strokes his growth in training
and grooms it endlessly

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 I’m cool with big moustaches
and whiskers are ok
and even sideburns can look cool
in an Elvis way
from interviews to touchines
he makes a groovy stance
from tip to to toe he’s good to go
and nothing’s left to chance
he’s caused face creams to shudder
Gillette are running scared
beware it’s taking over
Gaereth Southgate’s beard.

Notes

Obviously inspired by Lord Gareth of Southgate’s dapper touchline look..but also triggered by my fellow footie poets Kevins and goods friends: .Messrs Hall and Raymond. Bless…

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Source: http://footballpoets.org/poems/gareth-southgates-beard/