The Toffees have unearthed a Diamond, Playing in the Swedish League. “Or maybe the Norwegian one?” “No, Danish, I believe.” He’s built like that proverbial House That’s made of solid brick. A man for sure, he ain’t no mouse, He’s champing at the bit. He cost us only Sixty Grand, Just like our Stalwart, Seamus. […]

Guv’nor plonked a Big Screen in a London Jail, Inmates gathered round, they had no wine or ale. Only wheatgrass, tea or coffee they could sup, But my, you shoulda seen ’em lap that Final Up! Let’s watch, everbody, let’s watch! Not one fella in that calaboose Had any thought of breaking loose! Norman Stanley […]

Until thirteen, disliked Footee! Perhaps because I played so bad. Other sports too, the Egg ‘n’ Spoon, Or weird game played with ball and bat… Came Pubertee, what did I see? A bunch of blokes chasing a ball… ‘Most overnight, I saw the Light, And was converted like Saint Paul! Became a Fan, not yet […]

Well, Peter Osgood was good – Of Stamford Bridge The King. But Kenny was more regal, All Koppites will insist. And then there’s that skilled Belfast Boy, Whose family name was Best. Had he been born in Ancient Rome, He would have been a Rex. Now think of Cyrille Regis, A name to conjure with. […]

People try to put me down, Talkin’ ’bout my Coronation. Just because I wear a crown. Talkin’ ’bout my Coronation. Then they claim I’m far too old, Talkin’ ’bout my Coronation. And I cost my weight in gold, Raising burden of taxation. Years back there was Charles The First, He had a nice Coronation! Then […]