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Earwig Joe 2014 Version

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 Under a stone at the local park
Hid Earwig Joe in the cold and dark
Later that day he stirred to the sound
Of football players, running around.
He emerged to watch an exciting match
Dreams of glory began to hatch.

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 Later that evening he found a ball
He practised shooting against a wall.
Dribbling with ease with all six feet
Helped by his pincers his skill was complete.
One week later the teams came back
They played for a while, but then with a crack…

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 The striker went down yelling in pain
‘Oh no, I’ve broken my ankle again’.
Play was stopped when the whistle blew
Joe’s anticipation grew.
‘I can play’ he squeaked from the floor
No one heard so he shouted some more.

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 Then the players gaped in surprise
They couldn’t believe their very own eyes
An earwig?’ said one ‘You’re having a laugh,
I’d rather play with a pink giraffe.’
‘Wait’ said another ‘Give him a go’.
‘O.K,’ said the first,.’ you never know’.

5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 With nothing to lose they gave him a trial
Joe impressed and showed them style.
His ball control was frankly wizard
Striking like a gale-force blizzard
Eyes were agog as he shot for the net
A goal that made that keeper fret.

6 Leave a comment on verse 6 0 Earwig Joe was picked for the team
You should have seen that Earwig beam.
The team excelled and won each week
They really were now quite unique
The Blues went up, and up, and up.
With one more match to win the cup.

7 Leave a comment on verse 7 0 Joe and team were ready to play
Confident to win that day.
The opposing team
Looked hard and lean.

8 Leave a comment on verse 8 0 From the start they played it rough
But Joe and team were very tough
They hassled, tackled
Ran and passed;

9 Leave a comment on verse 9 0 A long cross then a goal at last!

10 Leave a comment on verse 10 0 But then a slip, defence was poor
The net result: – a half time draw.

11 Leave a comment on verse 11 0 The ref kicked off the second half,
Joe got hacked and held his calf
He hopped in pain on his other feet
Then soldiered on with not a greet.

12 Leave a comment on verse 12 0 Joe now a target, again was kicked
A red card was shown by Referee Strict.

13 Leave a comment on verse 13 0 But then disaster struck for Joe
The Reds had scored with minutes to go.

14 Leave a comment on verse 14 0 At 2:1 down, it didn’t look good
So he rallied the team, they understood.

15 Leave a comment on verse 15 0 Time was ticking as Joe watched the ball
The forwards ran and he made the call
The cross came back, no time for folly
He whacked it in with a solid volley.
Just in time to save the game
Earwig Joe had done it again.

16 Leave a comment on verse 16 0 A draw at the end left some on their knees
Then the players got ready for Penalties.
In the wink of an eye the score was 4-4
With one shot each to settle the draw.
The other team Captain ran up from afar
But slipped as he shot, he hit the bar.

17 Leave a comment on verse 17 0 This was Joe’s moment, he stood at the spot
With his pincers for balance,
He casually shot……….
The crowd went bananas,
They jumped up and down
They grinned and shouted
They shook the town
The whistle was blown
The team went mad
This was the moment they’d wanted so bad.

18 Leave a comment on verse 18 0 They lifted Joe up, the star of the game
An Earwig called Joe, had risen to fame.

19 Leave a comment on verse 19 0 A lap of honour was made for the crowd
And then the song that made him proud!

20 Leave a comment on verse 20 0 Here we go, Earwig Joe, Earwig Joe.

21 Leave a comment on verse 21 0 Here we go, Earwig Joe, Earwig Jooo-ooe

22 Leave a comment on verse 22 0 Earwig Joe, Earwig Joe, Earwig Joe

23 Leave a comment on verse 23 0 Earwig Jo-oe,

24 Leave a comment on verse 24 0 Ear -Wig –Joe.

25 Leave a comment on verse 25 0 Earwig Joe, Earwig Joe, Earwig Joe.

26 Leave a comment on verse 26 0 Earwig Joe, Earwig Joe, Earwig Jooo-ooe

27 Leave a comment on verse 27 0 Earwig Joe, Earwig Joe, Earwig Joe

28 Leave a comment on verse 28 0 Earwig Jo-oe,

29 Leave a comment on verse 29 0 Ear -Wig –Joe.

30 Leave a comment on verse 30 0 And so it went on…..

31 Leave a comment on verse 31 0 The ticker tape, banner strewn pitch faded to the echo of the song that became a footballing anthem forever after.

Notes

Here we go Here we go Earwig Joe
Add a scouse accent and sing away.

Editor Note: Welcome to Football Poets Martin. Such an epic football tale…is it based on true story. An emotional piece of work.

Here’s an old one from folk favourite Les Barker …

EARWIG O (Les Barker)

Little Mrs Earwig, she had a little son.
She called the baby Earwig A, for he was number one.
The second she called Earwig B. Earwig C came next.
D and E soon followed, then F as you’d expect.
G and H were subsequent. I and J came then.
K, L and M were triplets, but who followed Earwig N?

Earwig O, Earwig O, Earwig O,
Earwig O, Earwig O, Earwig O,
Earwig O, Earwig O, Earwig O,
Earwig O, Earwig O.

In the Insects league cup final, he gave the crowd a treat.
He gave the stick insects some stick. Earwig O could not be beat-o.
His first goal was a header, and his second sewed it up.
His third made it a hat-trick. Epsom Earwigs won the cup!
All the grasshoppers were chanting, all the spiders hand in hand in hand in hand in hand in hand in hand in hand,
As they sung the Earwig anthem, and it echoed round the stand:

Earwig O, Earwig O, Earwig O,
Earwig O, Earwig O, Earwig O,
Earwig O, Earwig O, Earwig O,
Earwig O, Earwig O.

Little Mrs Earwig, I wonder if you know
That your fifteenth little offspring is the famous Earwig O?
“Earwig O” they sing at Wembley, “Earwig O” at White Hart Lane,
At the Oval, and Old Trafford, “Earwig O Wig O” again.
“Earwig O” they chant at Chelsea, and the Royal Albert Hall.
Some talk of Alexander Beetle, but the greatest of them all…

Earwig O, Earwig O, Earwig O,
Earwig O, Earwig O, Earwig O,
Earwig O, Earwig O, Earwig O,
Earwig O, Earwig O.

Little Mrs Earwig, does it fill your heart with joy?
When they sing about your son-o, do you whisper “That’s my boy”?

Earwig O, Earwig O, Earwig O,
Earwig O, Earwig O, Earwig O,
Earwig O, Earwig O, Earwig O,
Earwig O, Earwig O.
Earwig O, Earwig O, Earwig O,
Earwig O, Earwig O, Earwig O,
Earwig O, Earwig O, Earwig O,
Earwig O, Earwig O.

Source: http://footballpoets.org/poems/earwig-joe-2014-version/