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The Ballad of Wesley Wesley Houlihan

Peter Goulding

Thursday, June 23rd, 2005

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 Wes and Stanley drew designs,
But needed to create straight lines.
“Say, would you have a ruler, Stan?”
Asked Wesley Wesley Houlihan.

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 Wes doesn’t like the heat a lot,
He says it makes him very hot.
“I’m off to buy a cooler fan,”
Laughed Wesley Wesley Houlihan.

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 He got suspended for a game,
Though claimed that he was not to blame.
“I can’t think of a crueller ban,”
Moaned Wesley Wesley Houlihan.

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 He looked for bread in Gay Paree,
And found a quaint boulangerie.
“Monsieur, avez-vous le pain?”
Dit Wesley Wesley Houlihan.

5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 He watched a goldsmith being chased,
And disappear from view with haste.
“Look how fast that jeweller ran!”
Grinned Wesley Wesley Houlihan.

6 Leave a comment on verse 6 0 He sung “Downtown” on karaoke,
In a voice quite hoarse and croaky.
“Sing better than Petula can,”
Whined Wesley Wesley Houlihan.

7 Leave a comment on verse 7 0 When Shels played Sligo in the Cup,
Weso got a bit mixed up.
“Are we going to Milan?”
Gasped Wesley Wesley Houlihan.

8 Leave a comment on verse 8 0 He listened to a boorish bloke
Who dribbled madly as he spoke.
“Don’t be such a drooler, man,”
Urged Wesley Wesley Houlihan.

9 Leave a comment on verse 9 0 When frying fish, he was surprised
To find the pan was undersized.
“Is there a miniasculer pan?”
Spake Wesley Wesley Houlihan.

10 Leave a comment on verse 10 0 He worked for Esso and for Shell,
But didn’t get on very well.
“How do you refuel a van?”
Mused Wesley Wesley Houlihan.

11 Leave a comment on verse 11 0 His granny read him story books
Of swordsmen apprehending crooks.
“I’d love to be a dueller, Gran!”
Sighed Wesley Wesley Houlihan.

© Peter Goulding 23rd June 2005

Notes

Weso is Shels’ midfield maestro

Source: http://footballpoets.org/poems/the-ballad-of-wesley-wesley-houlihan/