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When England Take On Switzerland

Crispin Thomas

Monday, July 1st, 2024

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 when England take on Switzerland
who cares if we still have no plan
there are no dreaded warning signs
we’ve played them twenty seven times
how could we ever be undone
we haven’t lost since ‘81
a well-trained dog is all we need
to teach us how to hold a lead
so let’s relax it will be grand
when England take on Switzerland

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 oh Switzerland oh Switzerland
I’ll never ever understand
why blueberries with your muesli
could make you take the risk to ski
on mountains where an avalanche
could leave you clinging to some branch
your scary Alps your hairy bends
that sometimes seem to never end
I’ve never been their biggest fan
when driving round in Switzerland

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 your Heidis and your praline chocs
your cheese with holes in and your clocks
the Swiss Roll you did not invent
however tasty or well-meant
your longest tunnel that by chance
is longer than our one to France
the only decent thing you’ve done
is you invented Toblerone
we cannot lose and to a man
we will demolish Switzerland

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 when England take on Switzerland
we’ll pick up where we first began
in ’66 and all those times
we showed the world why we’re so fine
our history speaks for itself
look at the trophies on our shelf
we are the finest in the land
we’ve even got a brilliant band
the Sound of Music in our ears
I promise it won’t end in tears
no need for tactics or a code
when Southgate’s Army hit the road
And like some mighty caravan
we will roll over Switzerland

Notes

Coming up : England v Switzerland Euro 24

What could go wrong.? We’re on a huge roll now..over-used pun intended.
At least we know it’ll be another relaxing chilled out game.

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Source: http://footballpoets.org/poems/when-england-take-on-switzerland/