The Nations League- not again
¶ 1
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Football has done it again
Crashing back down towards
The land of irrelevance
It’s the international break folks
And you’ll never guess
Where its compass has taken us
Yes folks, it’s the Nations League
That’s right
You heard it correctly
After the American and Canadian
Heartbreak city of World Cup
Woes and wailings
Where semi finals
Once again dragged England
Down into the dark chambers
Of what might have been
It’s another competition
Another group qualifying
Whitehall farce
Yet more ventures into
The world of the obscure
And inexplicable
The Nations League?
What on earth are
We supposed to make of that
Stupefying anti climax
It may just well be
The same page from
The same book
England enter the unknown
Or maybe this does lend itself
To music hall comedy,
Satire and mockery
England meet the world champions
Yes it is ridiculous
And barely credible
Spain! Yes that
Beautiful piece of porcelain
We were all privileged to watch
During a World Cup summer
Spain that well varnished
Mahogany cabinet,
A Victorian classic that
Sits exquisitely in the
Corner of your living room
Polished to perfection
But this time it’s
England against Spain
In the Nations League
Whoopee! We can hardly wait
A sweet fragrance of indifference
We simply don’t care
Hits us between the eyes
Apathy before kick off, half time
And don’t forget full time
We might watch the game
In our local boozer
Intoxicated by its fumes
Of utter insignificance
At least in the opinion
Of perhaps football’s purists
Who’d much rather do
The late night shopping expedition
Or just wander around Wembley way
Pretending to be interested
But it’s true
Thomas Tuchel’s boys
Are back on the international scene
And still Tuchel is haunted
By huge errors of judgement
Against Argentina
Some of us may take a rain check
On this one
The alternative has to be
A Netflix film
What a logical distraction
Or does AI already know
The result
It’s a fair point
But to misquote the Beeb
What has the Nations League ever
Done for us?
That’s paellas all around us
Let the matador flourish
The cape
It’s happening shortly
England against Spain
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