Fair Trade
¶ 1
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You can have my Christmas presents.
You can have my pay.
You can have the tie my girls will buy
for Father’s Day.
I will be your servant.
I’ll do anything you say
if Wayne Rooney fills my TV this World Cup Final day.
¶ 2
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You can have my wedding ring
(I’ll have to find it first).
You haven’t won since I’ve been married
(might that mean it’s cursed?)
I think you’ll find my wife won’t mind;
she’s leaving anyway
if Ross Barkley fills our TV this World Cup Final day.
¶ 3
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You can have our first grandchild
or name him for yourself.
Our whole household will go quite wild
if you pull off the shelf
the trophy that was once named after
Monsieur Jules Rimet;
if Steven G. fills our TV this World Cup Final day.
¶ 4
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You can have a kidney or a lung –
I’ll shake upon it.
You can have my liver
though it has some mileage on it,
no sorrows from this next World Cup
I’ll have to drink away
if England’s glee fills our TV this World Cup Final day.
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