FOOTBALL FARM (part one)
¶ 1
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Relax now, for a little while,
get yourselves all nice and calm,
and take a trip along with me,
into my football farm.
¶ 2
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Malcolm McDonald owns this farm,
says the sign on the Eric Gates,
as we go to meet the footballers,
with the animalistic traits.
¶ 3
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We’ll greet the old John Farmer,
on this chilly Mervyn Day,
and head into the Tony Field,
with the Tim Flowers and David Hay.
¶ 4
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As we John Wark along the Rodney Marsh,
in the freezing morning fog,
we catch a glimpse of Terry Bullock,
and ex – United Graeme Hogg.
¶ 5
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We don’t see Lenny Badger,
he’s below ground in a hole,
along with all the miners,
who dig for Ashley Cole.
¶ 6
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We see the ‘Cat’ Bonnetti,
leaping from a Michael Branch,
as we venture even deeper,
into this football ranch.
¶ 7
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The stags of Mansfield,
Ian Rush – ing by,
with West Hams Brian Dear,
watching out for Ruel Fox,
and Black Cats prowling near.
¶ 8
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Ramsey called the Argies animals,
which is a bit of a laugh,
as we spot his number five,
Jack Charlton ‘ the giraffe.’
¶ 9
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Then out of one of the Johnny Barnes,
strolls a weary looking ass,
it’s Tony Adams ‘the donkey’
him of the long hoofed pass.
¶ 10
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“Look!! there’s Colin Bell ‘Nyjinsky’
from Man City of course,
and Emlyn Hughes of Liverpool,
known as the ‘Crazy Horse.’
¶ 11
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Rolling in his pen area,
looking rather big,
is keeper Tommy Lawrence,
Liverpools ‘flying pig’.
¶ 12
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We see the Rams of Derby,
as to the hillside we get nearer,
playing very defensively,
afraid of Alan Shearer.
¶ 13
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The field is full of rodents,
just like an unkept house,
and we come across Kev Keegan,
known as the ‘mighty mouse.’
¶ 14
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They say don’t feed the animals,
but we don’t really care,
as we toss an old Jim Bone,
towards Celtic’s ‘Yogi Bear.’
¶ 15
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We feed ‘the goat,’ Shaun Goater,
City’s Bermudan star,
and we hurl bananas at ‘Monkey Reid,’
as he swings on a crossbar.
¶ 16
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We see Tigers from Hull City,
and Lions from Mill – wall,
Lev Yashin the ‘Black Panther,’
and Wolverhamptons Stevie Bull.
¶ 17
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We spot the nasty Norman Hunter,
with his loaded Bryan Gunn,
which he aims at Barry Venison,
and kills him just for fun.
¶ 18
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” HE’s kIlled Barmby”!!!
we hear an Eric Young girl cry,
as we put a stop to the Roger Hunt,
so no one else will die.
¶ 19
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It’s been a long and tiring day,
the clouds turning Eddy Gray,
now it’s time to look around ,
for a place where we can stay.
¶ 20
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We eat some Tony Currie,
and get ready for our bed,
which isn’t in Notts Forest,
but in the farmers ‘Chelsea Shed.’
¶ 21
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We sample an Alan Knight – cap,
of Greg Strong local cider,
and we notice a David Webb being spun,
by Rachid Harkouk the Palace ‘spider.’
¶ 22
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We spend the night in the Tommy Black,
telling scary Peter Storeys,
as we hear the Wolves all howling,
about their old past glories.
¶ 23
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So tomorrow is another day,
when we check out football birds,
so I have to go to sleep now,
and dream up some new words.
¶ 24 Leave a comment on verse 24 0 to be continued as ‘ football birds’
31
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