They tested the soil for acidity, They checked that the drainage was right. They hope it will grow with rapidity And the word on the street is, it might. They measured the depth it was planted, They’re keeping it safe from the birds, They’re praying it may be enchanted By the many encouraging words. When […]

Those little Swiss chappies Run round in their nappies. Whenever they fall They just lie there and bawl, And they certainly aren’t Too refined to say “Shan’t!” When they suffer defeat They just stamp their small feet And they stick out their tummies And spit out their dummies. Oh they’ve so much to learn, Those […]

There was a tall striker called Crouch, Who no-one considered a slouch. He ran in like a ghost And smacked into the post And the Kop to a man all cried “Ouch!”

Columns and columns of newspaper print, At which the supporters just fleetingly squint. The players take their turn to deliver their views, But nobody cares if we win or we lose. The media hype’s really failing to catch For we’re so underwhelmed by this forthcoming match. Nothing to play for, except maybe pride – The […]

Had I the brand new Ireland shirt, A masterpiece of emerald green, Embossed with logo extrovert And “Eircom” writ in font eighteen, I would wear it to all home games. But I being poor have just the top From World Cup 1994, Which my wife uses for a mop. Mop lightly, for you mop with […]