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Poems tagged ‘Arsenal’

Poised To Thrill. At One Hundred Mill.

kevin raymond

Monday, August 23rd, 2021

Is there anything like the absolutely blinding thrill
Watching a marauding one hundred mill?
In the guise of our returning prodigal chosen one?
Dump some hapless Gooner on his fife and drum
Leading the line to win at The Emptiness two-nil
To screams o’, ”Go on Lukaku, get in there…meshun!”.

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New Dawn

kevin raymond

Saturday, August 14th, 2021

We’re absolutely over the moon here in West London
As the new season gets ready to roll
T’aint the millions splashed on returning prodigal son
Or the epiphany of our geezer in goal.

Nah, it’s waking up to a breath-taking Saturday
Bathed in bright sunshine, hint o’ a breeze in the trees
and a round robin text from a pal o’ mine to say,
“Heard about The Arse? Stung on the bottle by The Bees”.

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Thoughts of A Fickle Fan.

kevin raymond

Thursday, July 15th, 2021

John-Joe sparked a smoke
Cracked a snarky topical joke
Bout Billy Bunter o’ The Arsenal, used play for us,
“As for Over-Eden Hazard at Madrid?
Injured? Who’s that Belgian trying a kid?
Quaffing mayoed pomme-frites, bier and molluscs?”,

Chipping his half-smoked cancer stick
J-J unwraps a steaming pack a haddock, roe n chips
Six pennyworth a crackling, wally, salt n vinegar pong
Sticking the snout behind his earring
Cracks an ice-cold can o’ Harpic, sneering,
“See Kev, they leave us, their life-style goes Pete Tong”.

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The Full English Final

Dave Martin

Friday, May 7th, 2021

They went thousands of miles to reach Baku,
To watch a north London derby, thanks to
Uefa’s cunning plan to spread their fame
And Azerbaijan sport-washing its name.

Less than six thousand fans in red or blue
Like Harry and Barry, Colin and Stew
Made the pilgrimage by car, train or plane
And Steady Eddie said, ‘Never again.’

Just one Englishman in the twenty-two
Who started, that’s modern football for you.
Premier League players come from every page
Of the atlas for a starring role, centre stage.

There were gaps in the stands, in defence too.
One was found by Olivier Giroud
To score the first goal, just after half time,
Leaving the Gunners with a mountain to climb

Made more hazardous by a Belgian, who
Provided one assist and then scored two.
For three minutes Iwobi gave them hope
But that sped away faster than an antelope.

It was back again by the customs queue.
When you support your team what can you do.
‘Where’s next year’s final?’ Stew was heard to ask.
Harry replied, ‘You’d best book flights to Gdansk.’

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I Wonder. Did I Ever Tell Yer…

kevin raymond

Monday, April 26th, 2021

Knew this fella, knew a fella
Old lags in The Boob together
For a little bit a TDA, while absolutely stocious drunk?
Every Saturday after-noon, in their cell
They joshed each other merry hell
Tuned in to Five-Live, lounging on her Madge’s bunk.

“Kev, we didn’t hardly ever ruck
Life in our Dingly? Sweet as hazel-nut
Till in The Derby, Tottnem miss a sitter
The sarcastic comments, guy lets fly
Set-off a ginormous hue n cry
Turning Spurs fans on our landing proper bitter.

Blimey, if only I tumbled him a Gooner
Would a dropped the loser sooner
T’was him what caused me stuck there in The Boob
Anyways, I cheer on Spurs, despite a slight conundrum,
With, “There’s only one team in North West London”,
Coz as you know, I’m through n through a Blue like you”.

“So, what landed the pair of you in The Boob?”,
“Well, we’re “Over the water” having had a lube
Tube Station shut, can’t hail a sherbet dab
We stagger in a South Westerly destination
Seeking a night bus to Fulham Broadway Station
A little worse for wear, due to shandy’s had.

Anyways, near The Crystal Palace ground
You’ll never guess what us two found?
An eerie garage rammed with resting double-deckers”,
“Right, we’ll soon be good to go to Fulham Broadway
Hi-jack one of these, we’re right as day
Just see me out son, that done, I’ll pull up and get yer”.

“Kev, so I see him out to the main road
Where I quickly have it on my toes
And wait for him to pick me up, in the dead a night
But, the hi-jacked double-d flies by
Him waving at me (I thinks) bye-bye
Perturbed, I chase the bus to catch it at the lights.

Banging on the passenger door
Kev, you should have heard me roar?
Like a Banshee, proper vexed at my accomplice
“Let me on, you no good so n so”,
I’m screaming at this hi-jacker, I hardly know
His reply, “Can’t you read the sign son…Out of Service?”.

“Anyways, I prise open the emergency door
Just as the long arm of local law
Come blue lights flashing, roaring round a hairpin bend
Another ten minutes I swear to you Kev?
That Gooner might have been brown bread
Eejit, displaying, Out of Service, instead of…The Worlds End”.

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Arsenal lift Covid FA Cup

Emdad Rahman

Saturday, August 1st, 2020

Every team needs a talisman
Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang
Working his Wembley magic again
Chelsea sent home with a bang

Never before have we seen
Such a spectacle at Wembley
Come Abide With Me
For the Covid London Derby

Joining Stroller Graham
It’s now Arteta the gaffer
Lifting the Cup as skipper
Now both player and manager

Chelsea had looked strong
Pulisic getting the cheers
Azpilicueta off, Kovacic sees Red
Leaving Martinez in joyful tears

01 07 20

number7
© emdad rahman

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Cold Shoulder.

kevin raymond

Monday, December 30th, 2019

Our Mairead don’t like The Arse
To say she hates them would be…harsh
While David Luiz bears brunt of her dislike
Took it right personally I‘m told?
Him racing down The Caledonian Road
En route to transfer talks at The Emptiness on his bike?

Cut off her Pre-Raphaelite Irish dancing hair
Dropped learning Portuguese in sheer despair
As the once iconic blue boy turned his back and walked away
From her beloved Stamford Bridge
Where she idolised him like a teeny bopping kid
Despite our Mairead being sixty-five come next birthday.

“Kev, him signing for them is a bleating pain?
He could have easily gone to France, or Spain
Anyone but them bleating Gooners would be okay”,
“Mairead, try to be realistic me old mate
Him being well past his sell by date
Means we’ve more than a chance of a double home/away”.

Over at The Emptiness, in North London yesterday
During a first half break, in a period of highly competitive play
A red shirted Brazilian spotted a familiar face in the away end looking glum,
“Mairead, ain’t seen you for ages, how yer doing babe, what’s the score?”,
A quip, a neatly coiffured Barnet of West London deemed her duty to ignore…
“Let that bleating Judas have his bit o fun…I’ve laid a long un on us bating them two one”.

Peace.

Barnet…Fare. Rhyming Slang for hair.
A long un. One hundred of.

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He’s Back Again, and… Down The Lane.

kevin raymond

Thursday, November 21st, 2019

Well… I never saw that appointment in North London coming?
Here in the capitals football one usually does?
Mourinho seemed destined for The Arse (and let’s face it…slumming!)
In the midst of a media maelstrom he loves.

Till Daniel Levy right nicked a march on The Arse
To get Jose strutting his stuff down The Lane
Rumour has it, when Saturday comes, after collecting his cards
Poch will be fast a kip at The Emptiness, during their game?

It’s the last chance saloon for Mourinho
Spurs are near brassic, tis fact
A blinding new stadium, senior pro’s all itching to go
Ain’t the usual cards, he finds…in a welcoming pack.

Still…it’s takes the mind off a Brexit
A right royal scandal, and a general election
An ordinary season thus far, has by one geezer’s exit,
Suddenly…been given an adrenalin injection.

Mourinho, let’s face it, ain’t everyone’s cup of rosy
Often at times he can do in yer nut
But most fans I talk to, can’t help but agree…
His appointment guarantee’s…this season is back on the up.

It goes without saying…it could all go Pete Tong
As it occasionally did with yer man in the past
Yet Spurs fans, down in their cups, over in North London
Might yet laud Daniel Levy…for nicking a march on The Arse.

Peace.

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The Eddie McGoldrick show

Emdad Rahman

Sunday, November 3rd, 2019

Standard Liege 0-7 Arsenal (1993 Cup Winners Cup)

Ariel Haan got the sack after the first leg
George Graham left Ian Wright out
Four at Highbury, seven away
Standard Liege get a huge knockout

Eddie McGoldrick on at half-time
For the Gunners a huge dividend
Setting up Merson and Campbell
And goal of the game at the end

Smith, Selley, Adams, Campbell twice
Merson adds six after five
Seaman’s throw, Merse plays Eddie
Ghosting run and rasping rocket drive

03 11 19

number7
© emdad rahman

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Arsenal for afters

Emdad Rahman

Monday, October 7th, 2019

We look the part
And top of the chart
Klopp say’s no need to excite

One hundred percent start
Looking extra smart
Soars high that bright red kite

Matip has the heart
Salah is pure art
Born for that limelight

Torreiro pulled the cart
But the Gunners fell apart
In this one sided Anfield gunfight

24 08 19

number7
© emdad rahman

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Source: http://footballpoets.org/news/poem-tags/arsenal/