Football Poets

The Monkey

We hadn’t won at Anfield
Since nineteen ninety-nine.
And slice it how you like,
That is a very long long time.

But now at last we’ve done it,
The monkey’s off our back.
The hoodoo has been laid to rest,
And Klopp must watch his back.

Richarlison was on the mark
With just three minutes gone.
The Reds were stung, they hogged the ball,
And piled the pressure on.

The second half was agony,
Nerve-racking, very tense.
Shots peppered left, right, centre,
But Pickford was immense.

About ten minutes still to play,
When DCL was floored.
The Ref he pointed to the Spot,
Our Iceman duly scored.

We’ve shook the monkey off our back,
The hoodoo’s put to bed.
Today all Merseyside is Blue,
There’s not a trace of Red.

21/2/21
Denys E. W. Jones

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Gianluca Vialli saving Everton

All Evertonians needed
was more love for Everton
and more Premiership football

But that was pending on
the Chelsea v Bolton game on
Sunday 10 May 1998

What if we were really down?
What if nothing ever came from
Gianluca Vialli?

That is why this name is
unforgettable for an Evertonian,
For me

The developement of that
football drama between Goodison
and Stamford Bridge took the shape in
unthinkable waiting for the goal
of Gianluca Vialli against Bolton

What If Vialli’s Chelsea
had lost to Bolton?

What if Everton had been relegated?

That was something like a
“Thank you Chelsea day”

Thanksgiving goes to Vialli

At Goodison, Barmby missed the penalty
The last thing we needed

Everton almost went down

Almost, just like 4 years before
in 1994

And today in 2021
I still remember
Gianluca Vialli saving Everton
and think of him

That is also what I call
the late 90’s

We could be in the Championship now
But Chelsea with those late goals
saved us in 1998

Wonderful day
Everton failing to beat Coventry at home
needed Chelsea to beat Bolton

Now, we have Ancelotti and
are really not bothering for our future

It is sad that Coventry is so far away
Lfe and football change

And Bolton ? And Today’s Chelsea?

The Show must go on

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Don’t Sell DCL

You can sell Tosun, Iwobi, Sigurdsson,
They’re not fundamental to our plans.
And Pickford can depart,
It wouldn’t break our hearts,
He drops too many clangers,
He just doesn’t look the part.

But don’t you dare sell,
Don’t sell our DCL,
I just don’t think we’d understand.
Can play up front alone,
He isn’t inj’ry prone,
He’s pretty much the Leader of the Gang.

James is often crocked, so he too can be flogged,
He’s not so essential to our plans.
He’s fine when fully fit,
He lights up the whole pitch,
Yet p’rhaps we would do well
To sell him back to Real Madrid.

But don’t, please don’t sell,
Don’t sell our DCL,
He’s absolutely crucial to our plans.
He’s up there with the best,
Dean, Latchford and the rest,
In plain and simple English, he’s The Man!

There’s loads more on our books that you could call dead wood,
I don’t think I need say who they are.
But they too could be sold,
They’re mostly rather old,
And wouldn’t bring in too much
At a Car Boot or bazaar.

But don’t sell our Dom,
Our Totem, our Icon,
I don’t think he really wants to go.
He’s fine at Everton,
We love him like a son,
And most importantly, he gets the goals!

19/1/21
Denys E. W. Jones

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Dies Vini Rosarumque

The autumn is a gloomy time,
The leaves fall from the trees.
Hard rains pour down, wild west winds blow,
And other things like these.

But we’re not feeling sad just now,
Our mood is quite upbeat,
Because we’re winning all our games,
Which means we’re still unbeat.

And what to say ’bout DCL?
He scores in every outing!
His critics are an extinct breed,
Nobody now is doubting.

No doom or gloom for us today,
We’re soaring, flying high,
We’re looking down on all the rest,
Above us only sky.

For some October may be bleak,
But not for us Bluenoses,
We would not call these dismal times,
They’re days of wine and roses!

We’re feeling rather chipper now,
Indeed, could not be merrier,
Because so pretty we do sit
Alone, atop the Premier.

5/10/20
Denys E. W. Jones

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Who are you, Cazoo?

Who are you, Cazoo?
What do you make or do?
Concoct some alcoholic brew?
Or manufacture paint or glue?
This is what I wished I knew,
When first I heard the name Cazoo,
Because I did not have a clue.
So I did a spot of Googleoo,
Now I know all about Cazoo –
They sell folk cars that have been used.
But still one thing I wish I knew,
Because I do not have a clue:
What has on earth Cazoo to do
With our beloved Royal Blue?
It seems some sort of deal went through.
They waved around wads of spondoos.
Now there’s Cazoo for all to view,
Splashed right across our Royal Blue.
To most of you it won’t be news
To read that I do not approve
Of trade names like this here Cazoo,
Emblazoned on the Royal Blue.
I wish they’d just say “Toodleoo”,
Leave us to do what best we do.
Nil Satis Nisi Optimu’,
Are words that most suit Royal Blue.

27/7/20
Denys E. W. Jones

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The Times

Everton scored for the trinity of the result
They scored only to be really bemused
Some credulity was shaken without a clear reason
The goal
The fans lived the two feelings
The goal and the ruled out goal
The venue was Maine Road
Where was the V A R?

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