A Hateful Confession
¶ 1
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Though mostly I’m a pleasant guy
The kind who wouldn’t hurt a fly
I must admit there’s just one thing
Leaves me enraged and glowering
Perhaps you share the feeling too –
It’s this: I really hate Man U
¶ 2
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It’s not their titles, cups and cash
It’s not the daily headline splash
I don’t begrudge their bought success
I really couldn’t care much less
It’s something of a subtler hue
That makes me simply hate Man U
¶ 3
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Their arrogance, that hateful flaw
That makes them seem above the law
And causes them to claim as right
With selfish, greedy appetite
Decisions that should go for you
No wonder that I hate Man U
¶ 4
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The offside goals allowed to stand
The spot kicks given on demand
The way they harass referees
The way they drench the game in sleaze
You might be hoops, or stripes, or blue
It’s natural to hate Man U
¶ 5
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The players, Rooney, Scholes and Keane
The snarls, the kicks, the aspect mean
There’s no real joy about their play
No smiles; they just want their own way
To win, through any avenue
You just can’t help but hate Man U
¶ 6
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“Sir” Ferguson, demented Scot
Regularly lost the plot
With stopwatch brandished, purple face
Every week a new disgrace
His disrepute charge overdue
Another cause to hate Man U
¶ 7
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They’re the idols of the BBC
The golden boys of Sky TV
Who talk about “United” and
We’re just supposed to understand
As if there weren’t a few more too
So Leeds United hate Man U
¶ 8
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You’d think it would be better now
They just can’t win, no matter how
They cheat, intimidate and dive
For better teams above them strive
To win – but I still know it’s true:
I’m always going to hate Man U.
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