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The Law Of Averages

Graham Smyth

Sunday, April 8th, 2001

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 You could not beat us,
Not this time.
The law was on our side.
The law of averages
(For it was he)
Stepped in to halt the tide.

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 Your mode of play was not so keen,
While ours was lean and mean.
The media narks were there of course –
The law enforced and seen.

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 Take one and one,
Divide by two,
Things even out the same.
You’ve had your time,
You’ve had your turn.
This was not your game.

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 The slide rule pass,
Cross in the box,
North End’s woes multiply;
A square pass roots you to the spot,
Divides defence in two.
You try to add some goals, but we
Subtract the piss from you.

5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 One add one add one again,
Calculates as three.
A geometrical equation to
Deepdale misery.

6 Leave a comment on verse 6 0 Arithmetic law’s averred
At Turf Moor’s lecture hall.
Doleful Deepdale Dunces learned
They’re average after all.

Notes

Les Mudd reckons the law of averages was against PNE on Friday night (6th April) at the Turf. He was right

Source: http://footballpoets.org/poems/the-law-of-averages/