The Only Bluenose?
¶ 1
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Italians like their Footie, as everybody knows.
The only things they love more are their mothers and their clothes.
And you will find tifosi of every single team
That plays in Serie A or B, C1, C2 or D.
¶ 2
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Juventus can boast legions of supporters.
At least one member of most families
(The father or the mother, son or daughter)
Goes weak-kneed at the thought of Sivori.
¶ 3
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Half of Milan declare they’re Milanisti.
The rest, it’s safe to say, are Interisti.
While Rome is simply rife with Romanisti.
And Turin’s home to hordes of Torinisti.
¶ 4
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Livorno fans are largely Comunisti.
Alas, some Laziali are Fascisti.
Then there are Genoani, and their foes, the Doriani.
They’re keener, fiercer rivals than Versace and Armani.
¶ 5
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Italians like their Footie. I’ll say it once again.
And many of them keep a close eye on the English Game.
They read the English Fanzines, subscribe to Sky TV,
And proudly swear allegiance to a Top Flight English team.
¶ 6
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Adherents of the Arsenal? Yes, there are quite a few.
And there’s no dearth of followers of Liverpool, Man U.
But where, oh where are those whose hearts beat for the Mersey Blues?
Well hidden, as in haystacks needles are.
¶ 7
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I’ve ranged and roamed the length and breadth of this boot-shaped countree.
I’ve seen the Tower of Pisa and all other sights worth seeing.
I’ve met an Old Etonian, a Latvian, an Estonian,
Yet never have I just so much as glimpsed an Evertonian.
¶ 8
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I don’t want to sound presumptuous, but I reckon I must be
The only bloomin’ Bluenose in the whole of Italee!
¶ 9
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26/1/06
Denys E. W. Jones
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