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Quality player, quality ball,
Peter please stop, we’ve heard them all.
When City don’t score, they hardly ever win,
Michael, cheers for stating the bleeding obvious thing.
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Why if a player hits the ball too well, Jeff,
Does the ball find itself nestling behind row F?
Andy, is winning on a cold rainy night in Stoke,
Really the biggest challenge in football to invoke?
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Roy, explain the mystery so everyone will know,
Why the most dangerous lead in football remains 3-1, or so.
Lumping the ball seems to have gone right out of fashion,
Is that why no one can put a corner beyond the first man, Alan?
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Goals win games, he’s got genuine pace,
Well-meaning cliches from all over the place.
If football is more important than life or death,
Then give us quality pundits is all we request.