Football Poets

FA Cup minnows

They all start off dreaming
Then comes the collective screaming :
Teams, from every corner of the land
Try their very best, whether praised or panned;

And for all these clubs, their FA Cup dreams
Start from unlikely places, wherever the draw deems
And there were certainly some very unusual names
That we could pick out, from this weeks games ;

The oddest one to catch the eye, had to be Odd Down
And then, as well as Rovers, Uniteds and many a Town
We can add, though we know not the nomenclature, more’s the pity
Suffice to say, at suffix city :

Collieries
Celtic
Bridge
Cables
Old Boys
Synthonia
Vics / Victoria
Ramblers
Hamlet
Invicta
Main
Winning
Heath
Sports
Casuals
Blue Cross
Brewery
Red Star
Dynamo
Dominoes
Terriers
Gate
Swifts
Olympic
Amateurs

I didn’t see any result, that mentioned Devizes
But there were some household names, in unfamiliar guises :

Ipswich Wanderers
Swindon Supermarine
Blackpool Mechanics
Bristol MF
Lincoln United
Lincoln Moorlands
Oldham Town
Newcastle Blue Star
Newcastle Town
Norwich United
Oxford City
Bury Town

So many of these monikers, such a delight to find
And with these strange names, some strange thoughts spring to mind :

Could Wembley, ever make it to the Millenium Stadium?
Could a player from Quorn, ever be involved in a meaty tackle?
Are Chasetown, good at chasing a game?
Are Esh, always Winning? I guess the fans are always singing?
When games are tight, do Bacup Boro, have a backup plan?
Will Concord’s season, take off at the speed of sound?
For Hamlet, will it be a case of … alas poor Dulwich, we knew them well? **
When Trafford grow old, do they morph into Utd?
Can Moneyfields, not buy their way to successki?
Are Dunston Federation Brewery, good at organising post-match piss-ups?
Can Rugby Utd, cope with the round ball?
If Seaham and Shepshed joined forces, we’d have Red Star Dynamo!
When Stone stumble, do they collapse like a pack of dominoes?
Do they have landed gentry, operating the turnstiles, at Squires Gate?
Does Thatcham Town, have anybody called Robinson playing for them? *
Who are the more casual in defence, Walton or Corinthians?
Do the Met Police, ever give an arresting performance?

So much fun, to be had with the names
Let’s sincerely hope, theres even more joy
For all those diehards, attending the games

---

Taken from the FA Cup Qualifying Results, listed in the Sunday papers, 31st August 2003.

Club suffixes, a favourite old topic of mine!

The following is a list of team names in full, of those clubs mentioned above

Atherton Collieries
Farsley Celtic
Bamber Bridge
Prescot Cables
Beaconsfield SYCOB
Billingham Synthonia
Borrowash Vics
Biddulph Victoria
Burnham Ramblers
Holker Old Boys
Folkestone Invicta
Rossington Main
Maltby Main
Esh Winning
Flackwell Heath
Concord Rangers
Dulwich Hamlet
Cowes Sports
Mickleover Sports
Woodley Sports
Corinthian Casuals
Walton Casuals
Trafford
Rugby United
Moneyfields
Leek CSOB
Wootton Blue Cross
Dunston Federation Brewery
Pontefract Collieries
Seaham Red Star
Shepshed Dynamo
Stone Dominoes
Bedlington Terriers
Squires Gate
Stourbridge Swifts
Rushall Olympic
Thatcham Town *
* (for all those of a certain Scorcher & Score generation! or was it Tiger, or was it both – the passing years deceive me!)
* (also, was it Thatcham or Thatchem, Utd or Town?)
Yorksire Amateurs

Some other ‘unusual’ names that caught my eye :
Deeping Rangers
Glapwell
Liversedge
Long Buckby
Marske United
Alsager
Raunds Town
Jarrow Roofing Boldon CA
Stocksbridge PS
Boldmere St Michaels
Thornaby
Yaxley

To the inhabitants of these towns / villages, please excuse my ignorance

** Yes, I know it’s a misquote! But I quite doubt that Dulwich Hamlet would have someone called Horatio playing for them!

You can follow any comments on this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a comment, or trackback from your own site.