Clearance awaited Before deal is completed Passports and visa’s Discussions quite heated. Transfer is on, Agents agree Buying club haggles Over payment of fee Ten million deposit Balance on tick Other clubs interested So we better act quick What about a compromise The chairman pleads down the phone To avoid all the hassle Can we […]

My finger nails would be manicured Not chewed down to the bone Or frustrated by injuries To young Michael Owen. With the money I’d save I would pay off my debts No running down to the bookies And placing daft bets. SKY TV. subscriptions Would come to an end Free from their shackles With money […]

My expectations are no means great Forty years I have had to wait Yes Forty years of meagre pickings ‘ HARD TIMES ‘ wrote old Charlie Dickens Hard times indeed for the geordie nation So don’t talk to me of expectation.

I’m a tired old footballer Who is now telling tales About lads who I played with Who have gone off the rails About managers I played under Who did not have a clue Coaches who never listened To my point of view. I recall many stories Of a glittering career All the highlights and lowlights […]

I’m a premiership footballer wearing Armani suits I’m paid a kings ransom For just wearing my boots With the makers brand name Stitched inside each tongue I intend making millions While I’m still young. My girlfriend is a model Often seen on TV A busy career girl earning as much as me. And as for […]