A Thousand Misses Deep

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 We bought you in the Window
and we got you on the cheap,
just after we let Luis go
(grown men were seen to weep).

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 You’re not his twin, or next of kin,
(was Brendan half asleep?)
and who but him would take you in
a thousand misses deep?

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 We loved you for your opener
in Ludogorets defeat,
all thinking that the floodgate
locks were soon to be released.

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 But ours is unrequited love;
a flame that gives no heat.
All joy expunged, our hopes have plunged
a thousand misses deep.

5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 Another European night,
defenders all at sea;
there was no Real glory left
against their 4-3-3.

6 Leave a comment on verse 6 0 When we had gone 4-3-2-1
the ball was at your feet
yet you contrived to hit it wide
a thousand misses deep.

7 Leave a comment on verse 7 0 Sometimes a player lies to refs,
sometimes a player cheats,
but every fan will tell you there’s
no virtue in deceit.

8 Leave a comment on verse 8 0 A lack of pace, a lack of grace
will make you obsolete.
And that’s the crime they’ll hang you for
a thousand misses deep.

9 Leave a comment on verse 9 0 We thought we’d bought a famous name
whose price was not too steep.
But all your well-known faults remain
a thousand misses deep.


An old poem for Mario Balotelli I’d lost until now in a dark corner of my computer.
Apologies to dearly departed Leonard Cohen.

Source: http://footballpoets.org/poems/a-thousand-misses-deep/