I am a loyal Liverpool fan,
I bought the shirt an’ all
I’ve been a fan for 5 months,
Since when we’ve won sod all.
I always listen to 606,
And every time we lose a game,
I’m usually first to ring in,
It’s my little five minutes of fame.
We are bloody crap I shout,
Houllier must get the sack,
It’s easy to criticise the manager,
When he’s in hospital on his back.
Why do we play these foreigners?
We need scousers in the team,
I must remember to book my place,
With the supporters from East Cheam.
We should sell Steven Gerrard I cry,
For a year he’s done nothing,
And I’d also sell Owen to Lazio,
I can’t be arsed, his name, to sing.
I rush to use the Internet,
In the forums I post with glee,
They let me get some exercise,
For my famous jerking knee.
We should let the youngsters play,
Some scousers coming through,
But in the team on Saturday,
It’s Carragher I boo.
“who are ya” I chant at small clubs,
If I ever make a game,
But I’ve never quite got the hang of
Poor Scouser What’s-his-name
Three cheers for a new stadium,
We’ll be bigger than the Mancs,
History, pride and dignity?
No it’s the money in the bank.
What do you mean I’m not a true fan?
I never get any thanks,
And why tell me to sit down,
When I stand up to boo our planks?
Fagan, Paisley, Roger Hunt?
On the Kop you used to stand?
Now you’re starting to confuse me,
Aren’t St. Etienne a band?
What is that flame outside the ground?
Why can’t I read the Sun?
What is this justice you call for?
Hasn’t it all been said and done?
Ok I’m going to leave now,
With red plazzy bag in hand,
I’ll whinge and moan and boo a lot,
‘Cause I’m a loyal Liverpool fan.