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An ode to the loyal Liverpool fan

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 I am a loyal Liverpool fan,
I bought the shirt an’ all
I’ve been a fan for 5 months,
Since when we’ve won sod all.

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 I always listen to 606,
And every time we lose a game,
I’m usually first to ring in,
It’s my little five minutes of fame.

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 We are bloody crap I shout,
Houllier must get the sack,
It’s easy to criticise the manager,
When he’s in hospital on his back.

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 Why do we play these foreigners?
We need scousers in the team,
I must remember to book my place,
With the supporters from East Cheam.

5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 We should sell Steven Gerrard I cry,
For a year he’s done nothing,
And I’d also sell Owen to Lazio,
I can’t be arsed, his name, to sing.

6 Leave a comment on verse 6 0 I rush to use the Internet,
In the forums I post with glee,
They let me get some exercise,
For my famous jerking knee.

7 Leave a comment on verse 7 0 We should let the youngsters play,
Some scousers coming through,
But in the team on Saturday,
It’s Carragher I boo.

8 Leave a comment on verse 8 0 “who are ya” I chant at small clubs,
If I ever make a game,
But I’ve never quite got the hang of
Poor Scouser What’s-his-name

9 Leave a comment on verse 9 0 Three cheers for a new stadium,
We’ll be bigger than the Mancs,
History, pride and dignity?
No it’s the money in the bank.

10 Leave a comment on verse 10 0 What do you mean I’m not a true fan?
I never get any thanks,
And why tell me to sit down,
When I stand up to boo our planks?

11 Leave a comment on verse 11 0 Fagan, Paisley, Roger Hunt?
On the Kop you used to stand?
Now you’re starting to confuse me,
Aren’t St. Etienne a band?

12 Leave a comment on verse 12 0 What is that flame outside the ground?
Why can’t I read the Sun?
What is this justice you call for?
Hasn’t it all been said and done?

13 Leave a comment on verse 13 0 Ok I’m going to leave now,
With red plazzy bag in hand,
I’ll whinge and moan and boo a lot,
‘Cause I’m a loyal Liverpool fan.

Notes

Was initially written after the defeat to Ipswich in December 2000 and updated slightly January 21st 2002 post the “crisis”, prior to the Man Utd victory – aimed at the nouveau fan.

Source: http://footballpoets.org/poems/an-ode-to-the-loyal-liverpool-fan/