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Eulogy.

kevin raymond

Friday, November 1st, 2019

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 Jimmy lived a quiet, quite un-extraordinary life
Deeming his business none but his own
Few drinks of a night, three intelligent kids, razor sharp wife,
Occasional trip back to Limerick…“Me home”.

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 His recent passing left all of us gutted
and a wry sense of humour sure to be missed
While the tale of the football opponent he nutted
One Sunday morning, had us laughing so much our sides split.

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 “Seems this stout fella steamed in to a tackle”,
Jimmy’s younger brother eulogised in our local church,
“Intending to maim in a fiercely fought battle
Where some-body’s almost a dead cert to get hurt?

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 Our Jimmy picked himself up, gave this fella the nut
Left him lying spark out on the sod
Sent off by the referee, after one almighty melee (an a ruck)
Turns out…Comatose Man was a fella of the cloth.

5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 Our mam, stood on the touch-line went radio rental,*
“That effin ref is a no good damn cheat”,
“Said man of the cloth, on realigning his differential
Gumbled he was minus his precious false teeth”

6 Leave a comment on verse 6 0 “Jimmy, help that poor priest, find his teeth or I’ll crucify ye”,
“Mam screamed aloud to her crestfallen son
Suffice twenty two players and accursed referee
Held up the game, in the search for false teeth, finding none.

7 Leave a comment on verse 7 0 Back getting changed after a fiercely fought game
Our Jimmy and the gummy priest sportingly shook hands
Before going outside, in to the pouring down rain
Where our Pac-a-mac mammy, stood gassing midst both sets of fans”.

8 Leave a comment on verse 8 0 “Sweet Mother of Jaysus”, “The gummy priest exclaimed out aloud”,
“Well honestly there’s a relief”,
“Seems after being knocked out, and fuzzily coming round
He remembered a pocket in his cassock held his set of false teeth.

9 Leave a comment on verse 9 0 Our Jimmy often laughed out aloud on recalling that day
He was after all…as everyone here knew a bit of a wit
Oh and before the pallbearers cart him away, he left word to say…
“Now do youse believe me…didn’t I tell all a yeese I was sick?”.

10 Leave a comment on verse 10 0 Peace.

Notes

A fictional little ditty inspired by footballs inner-city nitty gritty.

Go well.

Peace.

Kev.

*Radio rental. Rhyming slang for…mental. Livid, angry.

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Source: http://footballpoets.org/poems/eulogy/